Kuroko and Co Watches Kuroko no Basuke
by PurpleButterflyJane
Summary: All the cast have been gathered to watch Kuroko no Basuke.
1. Prologue

**Prologue:**

 **And So, All Are Gathered**

 **Takao:** Ne, Shin-chan, why are we here so early?

 **Midorima:** Because Akashi wants to watch Kuroko no Basuke. He only appeared in the last three episodes, so he missed most of the story.

 **Takao:** But why are _we_ here?

 **Midorima:** … Because Akashi said so.

 **Miyaji:** Just shut-up and watch!

 **Aomine:** ... _shut it_ , I'm trying to sleep here. _-yawns-_

 **Takao:**...

 **Midorima:**...

 **Miyaji:**...

...

 _And so, all the cast have been gathered._


	2. Episode 1

**Episode 1:**

 **I am Kuroko**

* * *

-P _re_ - _opening sequence_ -

 **Aomine:** Pfft! Akashi, you look like a kid! You're what, only half of Murasakibara's height? Ahaha!

 **Takao:** - _snickers_ -

 **Mibuchi:** Mou, they got all the proportions wrong! Don't listen to them, Sei-chan.

 **Akashi:** Daiki...

 **Aomine:** - _gulps_ \- err, okay, you're not _that_ short. They messed up.

 **Akashi:** Good we have that understanding, Aomine.

 **Aomine:** - _sighs in relief_ -

* * *

 **-** _O_ _pening song_ -

 **Akashi:** Why is no one commenting about how Kuroko looks like a lost child with a ball in that last frame?

 **Kuroko:** ...

* * *

 **-** _S_ _tart of episode_ **-**

 **Momoi:** Kyaaa! It's Tetsu-kun!

 **Kise:** Kurokocchi! They just ignored Kurokocchi! You should have gone to Kaijo, Kurokocchi!

 **Kagami:** Calm down, you two. Jeez.

* * *

- _Kagami goes to sign up_ _for the basketball club_ -

 **Hyuuga:** Kagami, how dare you manhandle Koganei like that! Even if he looks wimpy and doesn't act like a senior, he's still your senpai! Show some respect, you brat!

 **Miyaji** : Someone get me a pineapple...

 **Kasamatsu** : Want me to show you how to respect a senpai, brat?

 **Kagami:** A-er... Kuroko, a little help here?

 **Kuroko:** You're on your own, Kagami-kun.

* * *

 **-** _Aida orders the applicants to take off their shirts_ **-**

 **Mibuchi:** _Nice body_ , Taiga-chan. Too bad, you're not my type.

 **Kagami:** - _shivers_ -

…

 **Momoi:** Tetsu-kun is shirtless... Tetsu-kun in shirtless... Kyaaaaaah!

 **Aomine:** Hold yourself, Sastuki!

 **Kuroko:** ...

* * *

- _Kagami and Kuroko meet at the courtyard at night_ -

 **Aomine:** Damn, Tetsu. You're still like a ghost.

…

 **Midorima:** Kagami, you _smell_ people to know whether they are strong or weak?

 **Kagami:** Huh? Anything wrong with that?

 **Midorima:** …

 **Aomine:** …

 **Kise:** …

 **Akashi:** …

 **Murasakibara:** … gross.

…

 **Kise** : Kagamicchi, how could you be so mean to Kurokocchi?! That's it, I'm taking him to Kaijo!

 **Kasamatsu** : Shut up, idiot!

…

 **Takao:** "I am a shadow..." pffft!

 **Kuroko:** … please ignore it.

* * *

- _P_ _ractice match, 1_ _st_ _years vs 2_ _nd_ _years_ -

 **Momoi** : Kyaaah! Tetsu-kun is on the roll!

 **Kise** : Kurokocchi is really amazing!

 **Kasamatsu:** Shut up, Kise! I can't hear a thing!

 **Kise:** Ouch! Eh? Why only me?

 **Kasamatsu:** … Momoi-san's a woman. Of course I can't hit her.

 **Momoi:** Kyaaaaaah! Go, Tetsu-kun!

...

 **Aomine:** Heh, your shots still suck, Tetsu.

* * *

 **-** _Scene outside Maji Burger_ **-**

 **Takao:** "I am a shadow... But the stronger the light, the darker the shadow... I will be the shadow to your light..." pffft... ahahaha! That's worse than Shin-chan's lines.

 **Kuroko:** …

 **Midorima:** … Takao, I advise you to stop it, before something bad happens.

* * *

 **-** _Ending Song_ **-**

 **Akashi:** Why is it that Kuroko seems taller in that last frame with his whole team?

 **Mibuchi:**...You're still bothered about it, Sei-chan?

 **Akashi:** ...


	3. Episode 2

**Episode 2:**

 **I am Serious**

* * *

- _P_ _re_ - _opening sequence_ -

 **Akashi:** … They still haven't corrected my height. When are they going to change the pre-opening sequence?

 **Midorima:** … They are removing it in episode 20.

 **Akashi:** … - _frowns_ -

 **Kuroko:** - _smirks_ -

* * *

- _In front of the library scene_ -

 **Kise:** Kagamicchi is manhandling Kurokocchi! Stop being so mean, Kagamicchi!

 **Hyuuga:** It's okay, they are both in the same year.

 **Miyaji:** Yeah. It's not like he's disrespecting a senpai.

 **Kasamatsu:** Shut up, Kise.

 **Kise:** All of you are so mean!

* * *

- _Aida in her room, in the middle of making training programs_ -

 **Hyuuga:** … ' _Riko-chan looks cute with those glasses_ _on_ _, though I will never say it out loud._ '

 **Kiyoshi:** Hyuuga, what's wrong? You're grinning like a loon.

 **Aida:** - _remains_ _oblivious_ -

* * *

- _Announcing their name, year, and goals in the rooftop to the crowd below_ -

 **Momoi:** … this is all your fault, Dai-chan.

 **Aomine:** Huh? What did I do? And stop calling me that!

 **Momoi:** If you didn't lose during the winter cup, Tetsu-kun would be confessing his love for me by now. ' _N-naked_ _'_.

 **Aomine:** Oi, you're drooling!

 **Kuroko:** …

…

 **Himuro:** Taiga, it's dangerous to stand on the railing like that.

 **Akashi:** ' _Defeat the Generation of Miracles, he says? I'll teach him later..._ '

…

 **Kise:** - _sniff_ \- Kawaharacchi, I didn't know you have that kind of past. I thought you're just one of the weak characters. _Yosh_! From now on, I'll train you! Just like how Kurokocchi mentored me, I'll-

 **Kasamatsu:** Shut up, Kise!

 **Kawahara:** Ahaha...

…

 **Kise:** - _sniff_ \- Fukudacchi... I'm moved. You're just like Kurokocchi in that way, always wanting to help others.

 **Kasamatsu:** …

 **Kuroko:** ...

 **Fukuda:** ...

…

 **Kise:** Furihata, your reason is too petty.

 **Furihata:** eep!

...

 **Hayakawa:** Kuro(ko) has a smal(l) voic(e)? He was ver(y) lou(d) when he cheere(d) for Kis(e) whe(n) we fought agains(t) Haiza(ki)!

 **Kasamatsu:** And you're too loud, idiot!

…

 **Momoi:** Aww... Only Tetsu-kun didn't get to speak...

* * *

- _Maji burger scene, Kuroko confesses to Kagami about his reason for playing basketball, and choosing Seirin_ -

 **Akashi:** …

 **Aomine:** …

 **Kise:** …

 **Midorima:** …

 **Murasakibara:** …

 **Momoi:** … - _smiles sadly_ -

* * *

- _Locker room scene_ -

 **Kise:** Look, look! I'm on the cover of Basketball Monthly!

 **Kasamatsu:** Sit still, idiot! I can't see the screen!

 **Kise:** Ouch!

…

 **Momoi:** Aww... They forgot to put Tetsu-kun in the magazine...

 **Aomine:** - _pats Kuroko's back_ -

* * *

 _-Kise makes an appearance-_

 **Kise:** Look, I'm there! Don't I look so cool?

 **Kasamatsu:** - _veins popping_ -

* * *

- _Kise sitting in the gym, girls flocking around him_ -

 **Kasamatsu:** Stop being so full of yourself, idiot!

 **Kise:** Ouch! I'm not even saying anything now!

 **Aomine:** That girl there has big breasts...

* * *

- _Kise with the members of Seirin_ -

 **Kise** : So mean, Kurokocchi keeps on rejecting me...

 **Kuroko** : … heh.

…

 **Kagami:** Ouch! What was that for, Hyuuga-senpai...desu?

 **Hyuuga:** You're too cocky, brat!

 **Kiyoshi:** Ahaha!

...

 **Murasakibara:** ...Kise-chin's too flashy.

 **Kise:** Ouch! What did you do that for, Kasamatsu-senpai?

 **Kasamatsu:** … I just feel like doing it.

* * *

- _ending song_ -

 **Akashi:** When will the ending sequence change?

 **Midorima:** ...Episode 14

 **Kuroko:** …

 **Akashi:** - _smirks_ -

 **Mibuchi:** - _sighs_ -


	4. Episode 3

**Episode 3:**

 **It's Better if I Can't Win**

* * *

- _pre-opening sequence_ -

 **Akashi:** - _frown_ \- This is ridiculous. Let's skip this next time. It's the same thing anyway.

 **Takao:** Pffft!

* * *

 _-Scene where Taiga ends up not sleeping the whole night-_

 **Kuroko:** So, you were thinking about Kise-kun the whole night?

 **Kagami:** Damn it, Kuroko, you're making it sound too creepy!

* * *

- _At Kaijo entrance, when Kise comes to pick them up_ -

 **Aomine:** … Kise, you say some creepy things there. - _backs away_ -

 **Takao:** … yeah, it isn't even funny anymore. - _backs away_ -

 **Kise:** Eh? What do you mean? What do they mean, Kasamatsu-sen-

 **Kasamatsu:** - _backs away_ -

 **Kise:** Kuro-

 **Momoi:** - _hides_ _Kuroko_ _behind her back_ _and_ _slowly_ _backs away_ -

 **Kise:** Huh? Why is everyone-

 **Kagami:** - _backs away_ -

 **Midorima:** - _backs away_ -

 **Murasakibara:** - _backs away_ -

 **Everyone except Akashi:** - _backs away_ -

 **Kise:** - _hopeful_ \- Akashicchi! Please tell me-

 **Akashi:** … - _backs away_ -

 **Kise:** So mean! Everyone's so mean!

* * *

\- _Kaijo's coach belittles Seirin_ _before the practice game_ -

 **Aida:** It still pisses me off...

 **Kise:** Ow! Why are you hitting me?

 **Aida:** Because your face screams Kaijo!

 **Kasamatsu:** … - _backs away_ _from Riko_ -

* * *

- _Kagami breaks the_ _hoop_ -

 **Kuroko:** Kagami-kun, you still haven't paid for it.

 **Kagami:** E– !

* * *

- _Girls come to cheer for Kise_ -

 **Kise:** Ouch! What did you do that for, Kasamatsu-senpai?

 **Kasamatsu:** Sorry, it was on reflex.

* * *

- _Practice_ _g_ _ame resumes_ -

 **Midorima:** Hmph! All they're doing are just showy dunks.

 **Takao:** Pffft! As if your shots aren't. Ahahahaha!

* * *

- _Silhouette of the GoM flashes on screen_ -

 **Akashi:** Why do they keep on recycling that horrible scene?

 **Takao:** - _trying to control his laughter_ -

 **Akashi:** …

* * *

- _Kagami attempts a fadeaway shot_ -

 **Midorima:** Figures that the first time he tries not to dunk, he fails.

 **Kagami:** Shut up! I bet you can't even dunk!

 **Midorima:** Dunks are inferior compared to my three-pointers.

 **Kagami:** You're just jealous!

 **Midorima:** Hmph!

 **Kagami:** Hn!

 **Takao:** Hahahahaha!

* * *

- _during time-out_ -

 **Momoi:** Don't do that to Tetsu-kun, you barely B-Cup!

 **Aida:** Huuuuh? I'm their coach, and I can do anything I want!

 **Momoi:** Grrrr...!

* * *

- _crowd cheers for Kasamatsu_ -

 **Kasamatsu:** … why are all my cheerers males?

 **Kise:** Don't mind it, Kasamatsu-senpai. You're still cool!

 **Kasamatsu:** Shut up! I don't want to hear that from you!

 **Kise:** So mean...

* * *

- _during ball out of bounds-_

 **Akashi:** Kise, would you like to explain to me how Basketball is a sports of _size_?

 **Kise:** Eeeep! You're an exception, Akashicchi! You're the exception to every rule!

…

 **Akashi:** Kagami, I fail to understand the logic behind your reasoning.

 **Mibuchi:** It's that you know, _that._ A person's weakness of the _heart_. It was quite apparent from the beginning of the episode.

 **Akashi:** Oh... but what about the thing about being invisible?

 **Kuroko:** Don't mind him, Akashi-kun. Kagami-kun just wants to appear smart. And Kise-kun, that one was gross.

 **Kagami** : Oi, Kuroko! You bastard...!

 **Kise:** Kurokocchi, so mean! - _cries_ -

...

 **Akashi:** - _smirks_ \- Now they made Kuroko look too short. Good Job, Kagami.

 **Kuroko:** … pre-opening.

 **Akashi:** …

 **Mibuchi:** - _shakes head_ -

* * *

- _ending song_ -

 **Akashi:** Let's skip the ending sequence too.

 **Kise:** You can't, Akashicchi. There's a frame there that's different every episode. See? I'm featured on it this time.

 **Akashi:** ... _che_.

 **Kuroko:** - _smirks_ -


	5. Episode 4

**Episode 4:**

 **Take Care of the Counterattack**

* * *

- _pre-opening sequence_ -

 **Akashi:** - _immediately skips it_ -

 **Kuroko:** ...che.

* * *

- _still on break_ -

 **Kuroko:** … so everyone thinks I'm the weakest guy.

 **Aida:** A-ahaha! I didn't mean it like that!

 **Kagami:** W-what are you saying, idiot?

 **Kise:** O-of course not, Kurokocchi! Right, Aominecchi?

 **Aomine:** Y-yeah.

 **Kuroko:** …

* * *

- _Kuroko jabs Kagami_ _at the side_ -

 **Koganei:** Kuroko, is that Kasamatsu's influence?

 **Kuroko:** It's helpful for keeping idiots in check.

 **Kagami:** Oi!

 **Kise:** Eeh?

 **Kasamatsu:** - _smirks_ -

* * *

- _Kagami jabs back-_

 **Momoi:** Kagamin! You shouldn't do that to Tetsu-kun!

 **Kagami:** Eeh? Why? I'm just returning the favor.

 **Hyuuga:** He isn't an idiot like you, _idiot_!

 **Kagami:** - _sulks_ -

 **Kuroko:** - _smirks_ -

* * *

- _second quarter_ -

 **Momoi:** Kyaah! Tetsu-kun's super cool!

 **Kise:** How about me, Momoicchi?

 **Momoi:** Ah? You were there, Ki-chan? Sorry, I was only watching Tetsu-kun.

 **Kise:** … - _cries_ -

* * *

- _Hyuuga lands a three-pointer_ -

 **Hyuuga:** How dare you ignore me too, Izuki!

 **Izuki:** Sorry, captain, I'm not a fan.

 **Hyuuga:** _Lame_.

 **Izuki:** -shrugs- I tried.

* * *

- _still on second quarter_ -

 **Aomine:** … Oi, Kise, stop being too fixated on Tetsu. It's ruining the game.

 **Kise:** I can't help it! We haven't played since middle school!

 **Aomine:** … _Lame_.

 **Kise:** Shut up, Aominecchi!

* * *

- _Kagami uses Kuroko's head as support to block Kise's three-pointer_ -

 **Kuroko:** Kagami-kun... you were very heavy. Even though you were raised in America, you should cut back on your burgers.

 **Kagami:** No way. Impossible. Rejected.

…

 **Kuroko:** … Even this 'most useless' guy's head could be useful as a stand.

 **Kasamatsu:** A– Er– Um– No– I didn't mean– Oi, Kise, say something!

 **Kise:** Eh? Why me? Ah, Kurokocchi, senpai didn't mean it that way. I swear!

 **Kuroko:** …

* * *

- _Kise accidentally hits Kuroko_ -

 **Aomine:** Oi, Kise, how hard did you hit Kuroko for him to bleed like that?

 **Kise:** Eeeh? I didn't hit him that hard! I swear!

 **Momoi:** Ki-chan... - _vein pop_ -

 **Kise:** Eeep!

 **Akashi:** I feel like something like this happened before... Anyway, you get injured to easily, Kuroko.

 **Kuroko:** … It's not my fault.

* * *

- _time out because of Kuroko's injury_ -

 **Takao:** Pfft! "Get on your knees," that sounds like Akashi's line, right, Shin-chan?

 **Midorima:** ...

 **Aomine:** I don't know who's scarier: Hyuuga on switch mode, or Akashi.

 **Kagami:** It's Akashi. Believe me, it's Akashi. - _shivers_ -

 **Akashi:** ...

* * *

- _Game resumes, Aida introduces the seniors and their specialty_ -

 **Momoi:** … Izuki-kun, you would have been a more popular character without your puns.

 **Izuki:** I aim to be punpular.

 **Hyuuga:** Die, Izuki!

 **Izuki:** !

...

 **Takao:** Pfft! Really, like no one's ever heard you talk? Seriously?

 **Mitobe:** …

 **Koganei:** He said, "F*ck off, Bakao! You've got a problem with me not talking, huh?"

 **Takao:** …

 **Everyone:** …

 **Everyone:** … Eeeeeeh?!

 **Mitobe:** … - _sweatdrops_ \- _'I_ _didn't actually say that._ _'_

 **Koganei:** - _smirks_ -

…

 **Mibuchi:** Ara~? I can't believe the one who almost stopped my shot was a weakling.

 **Koganei:** eeep!

* * *

- _Midorima and Takao makes their first appearance_ -

 **Akashi:** … Midorima, when did you become such a prima donna?

 **Takao:** Pfft, ahahahha!

 **Midorima:** ...

* * *

- _Kuroko gets up_ _despite having an injury_ -

 **Takao:** "I promised that I would be-"

 **Kuroko:** Please don't say anything else, Takao-kun.

 **Takao:** Pffft!

* * *

- _F_ _ourth quarter,_ _Kise becomes serious_ -

 **Kuroko:** Is it really detestable to lose against me, Kise-kun? Is it because I am the weakest and the most useless player?

 **Kise:** Eh? - _fumbles_ \- Of course it's not like that! I just hate to lose, see? Kurokocchi is amazing in a way! You can–

 **Aida:** _-sweatdrop-_

 **Kasamatsu:** _-sweatdrop-_

 **Kuroko:** … - _smirk_ _s_ -

* * *

- _Final alleyoop_ -

 **Akashi:** How is it possible for a person to stay in mid-air for about 7 seconds? Even Mich**l Jor***'s dunk takes less than a second.

 **Kise:** You timed it, Akashicchi?

 **Akashi:** Hm? No, not the whole jump. His mid-air speech was at least that long. So he probably stayed mid-air longer. If it were a normal person, he would have been up the gym's roof by that time.

 **Everyone:** - _sweatdrops_ -

* * *

- _Ending picture_ -

 **Aomine:** … You're really into Tetsu, Kise?

 **Kise:** Eh? No! Not _that_ way! I just–

 **Kuroko:** Please stay away from me, Kise-kun.

 **Kise:** So mean! - _cries_ -


	6. Episode 5

**Episode 5:**

 **Your Basketball**

* * *

- _Seirin wins-_

 **Aida:** - _smiles and hums_ -

 **Akashi:** We must beat Seirin next time.

 **Mibuchi:** That's a given. But why this time in particular?

 **Akashi:** - _smirks_ \- Won't it be amusing to see Hyuuga confess 'butt naked' as he calls it?

 **Mibuchi:** Junpei-chan's not really my type. But that would certainly be interesting~

 **Hyuuga:** - _shivers_ -

 **Aida:** - _continues to hum, ignoring them_ -

* * *

- _Kise and Midorima meet_ s-

 **Akashi:** Midorima, you still say things like 'fate' with a straight face.

 **Midorima:** … And you say things like 'Lower your head' with a more serious face.

 **Akashi:** … That wasn't really me back then.

 **Midorima:** …

 **Akashi:** …

 **Takao:** - _snickers_ -

* * *

- _Takao arrives_ -

 **Akashi:** … Takao, he made you pedal the bike all the way from Tokyo to Kanagawa?

 **Kiyoshi:** - _gives Takao a brown-sugar candy and ruffles his head_ -

 **Murasakibara:** - _gives Takao a maibo_ \- … you deserve it.

 **Midorima:** …

* * *

- _Seirin pools their leftover money_ -

 **Everyone not Seirin:** … ' _only_ _21 yen?_ '

 **Akashi:** ... Kuroko, I can lend you some if you really need cash. You're too skinny as it is.

 **Kuroko:** No thank you, Akashi-kun.

* * *

- _Steak house, where everyone was forced to eat 4k steak_ -

 **Sakurai:** I'm sorry for asking, but is there a reason why the three first years who did not play in the practice game are in their own table, while everyone shares the long table? Even the senpai who did not play sits at the long table. Ah, I'm sorry for noticing it. I'm sorry for bothering you with my worthless question. I'm sorry for being worthless.

 **Imayoshi:** We get it, we get it already. You can stop apologizing now.

 **Sakurai:** I'm sorry for being a bother. I'm sorry for living!

 **Everyone:** - _sweatdrops_ -

...

 **Takao:** Huh? There's a silhouette of someone being chased by a large man with a frying pan outside the window behind Aida-san.

 **Izuki:** Now that you mention it, I wonder if it's...

* * *

- _Kuroko gives up_ -

 **Akashi:** That's why you're too skinny, Kuroko. You don't give up on basketball, but you easily give up on food.

 **Kuroko:** This and that are two different things, Akashi-kun.

* * *

- _Kagami finishes all their steak_ -

 **Kuroko:** … that's why he was so heavy. Please be more considerate next time, Kagami-kun.

 **Nebuya:** Hey, I could also handle something like that!

 **Akashi:** … Nebuya, just to be clear, you are not allowed to use my head as a support.

 **Everyone except Akashi:** ' _As if anyone would dare to!_ _'_

 **Midorima:** … _Ahem_. Anyway, a stomach of a person could only hold a maximum of 3 or 4 liters, which converts to 3 or 4 kilos of water.

 **Aomine:** But weren't they having a 4kg steak?!

 **Everyone:** ...

 **Kise:** -feels sick- The calories... The kilos...

 **Aomine:** … I'm more impressed by his black-hole of a stomach than his basketball.

 **Kagami** : Hey, what do you mean by that, Aomine you bastard?

 **Akashi:** Isn't there usually a 'no sharing' policy for those kind of things?

 **Seirin team:** - _sweatdrops_ -

 **Takao:** Pffffft! Ahahahaha! So that was what the man with the frying pan was!

 **Izuki:** …

* * *

- _Kise meets Kuroko outside the steak house_ -

 **Aomine:** Kise, you were waiting for Kuroko the whole time?

 **Kuroko:** ...

 **Momoi:** … how much stalker-ish can you get, Ki-chan?

 **Everyone:** - _stares at Kise suspiciously_ -

 **Kise:** It's not like that! Really, it's not!

 **Everyone:** - _continues to stare at Kise, unconvinced_ -

* * *

- _Kise brings Kuroko to the park_ -

 **Aomine:** Man, stop being so gay, Kise.

 **Kise:** It's true that Kurokocchi turned me down!

 **Everyone:** …

 **Kise:** Geez, not that! I invited him to join us, remember?

 **Aomine:** … there was never an 'us', Kise. I don't even swing that way.

 **Kise:** In Kaijo! I invited him to join our Kaijo basketball team!

 **Everyone:** - _still backs away from Kise_ -

 **Kise:** Everyone's so mean! -cries-

* * *

- _Kuroko tells Kise about Kagami's love for basketball_ -

 **Aomine:** ...

* * *

- _Kuroko gets involved with the bullies in the park court, and Kagami and Kise joins in_ -

 **Akashi:** Kuroko, I thought that the difference between you and Kagami is only 22cm.

 **Kuroko:** … that's right.

 **Akashi:** At least I'm not the only one whose height they keep on messing up - _smirks_ -

 **Kuroko:** - _frowns_ -

* * *

- _In the middle of the game at the park_ -

 **Hyuuga:** You brat... we were looking all over for you, and you were just playing?

 **Kuroko:** Ouch, that hurts Hyuuga-senpai.

* * *

- _after the game, where Kagami scolds Kuroko_ -

 **Akashi** **:** You really don't have self-preservation, Kuroko.

 **Momoi:** Kyaaah! Tetsu-kun's 'guns'!

…

 **Takao:** "You'll always stand by the light..." pfffft!

 **Kuroko:** -smirks-

 **Kagami:** Stop it!

* * *

- _Aida spots them_ -

 **Momoi:** How dare you manhandle Kuroko like that, you flat-chested woman! He's still injured!

 **Aida:** Huh? That's none of your business, cow-tits!

 **Akashi:** ...I think you're better suited for the title 'demon' than I am, Aida-san.

 **Everyone except Akashi:** … ' _Nothing could be farther from the truth!_ '

* * *

- _Ending picture_ -

 **Akashi:** It's been bothering me for sometime... Who's that senpai in between Koganei-san and Mitobe-san?

 **Tsuchida:** ...


	7. Episode 6

**Episode 6:**

 **Let Me Tell You Two Things**

* * *

- _Classroom scene,_ _where Kagami gets scolded for sleeping, but Kuroko wasn't_ -

 **Aomine:** Dang, your lack of presence is really useful, Tetsu.

 **Momoi:** Dai-chan...

* * *

- _Aida explains about the special bread_ -

 **Murasakibara:** … I want one too.

 **Imayoshi:** - _whistles_ \- your captain is scary.

 **Kuroko:** … ' _3x training... t_ _hat is nothing against Akashi-_ _kun_ _'s training menu._ '

...

 **Izuki:** Pan pun! I'm a genius!

 **Hyuuga:** Die, Izuki.

* * *

- _Cafeteria scene_ -

 **Akashi:** … Kagami, are you sure you grew up in America?

 **Kagami:** Huh? Of course I did.

 **Midorima:** … your Engrish sucks.

 **Kagami:** Oi!

 **Himuro:** Ah, they also use Japanese at home, like mine.

 **Murasakibara:** Muro-chin is better though.

 **Himuro:** Ahaha... Thanks, Atsushi.

...

 **Hayama:** Crowd surfing? That looks epic, man. I wanna try that too!

 **Akashi:** Go on. You be the board, and I'll stand on you.

 **Takai:** Pffft. Yeah, and bring a whip with you too. Ahahahaha!

 **Akashi:** Nice idea, Takao. That way I can ' _calm_ ' the ' _waves_ '.

 **Everyone:** … - _sweatdrops_ -

 **Akashi:** … I was joking.

 **Everyone:** - _It doesn't look like he's_ _even_ _joking!_ -

...

 **Fukui** **:** Their first-years are useless.

 **Kagami, Furihata, Fukuda, and Kawahara:** ...

…

 **Midorima** : As expected: Only Kuroko can manage the task.

 **Akashi:** Hn. Of course Kuroko is many times better than them. I was the one who trained him after all.

 **Seirin:** - _sweatdrops_ -

 **Murasakibara:** Kuro-chin, buy me one too.

* * *

- _Kuroko bites on Iberian pork sandwich_ -

 **Momoi:** -bites on her handkerchief- kaaah! I want to see Tetsu-kun's happy face too!

* * *

- _Kagami eats his super large BLT sandwich_ -

 **Kuroko:** I'm surprised that Kagami-kun could cook so good, even if he doesn't care about the taste.

 **Himuro:** … It's natural talent.

 **Aomine:** Just like his black-hole stomach.

 **Midorima:** And his gravity-defying jumps.

 **Kagami:** Oi! Are those compliments, or insults?!

* * *

- _Aida shows them a picture of a kitten by mistake_ -

 **Momoi:** Kyaaah! So Tetsu-kun also likes cute things! - _writes it down_ _on_ _her notebook_ -

* * *

- _Papa criticizes the Generation of Miracles-_

 **Akashi:**... - _frowns_ \- I hope you crushed them thoroughly, Kuroko.

 **Aomine:** - _yawns_ -

 **Kise and Midorima:** - _no care_ -

 **Murasakibara:** - _continues eating snacks_ -

 **Kuroko:** ...

* * *

- _Papa mistakes Kuroko as a child_ -

 **Takao:** HAHAHAHA! That's the best one so far! HAHAHA!

 **Kuroko:** … please _shut up_ , Takao-kun.

 **Takao:** Pfffft! - _snickers_ -

* * *

 _-Papa thinks the GoM are children-_

 **Everyone:** -snickers-

 **Takao:** HAHAHAHAHA! I'm starting to like that fellow!

 **Murasakibara:** Mou! I'm not a child!

 **Kise:** Hey! That's a mean thing to say! Kurokocchi, go crush them!

 **Aomine:** Next time we're going to face them, I'll show him...!

 **Everyone:** - _snickers harder_ -

 **Takao: -** _laughs harder_ **-**

 **Akashi:** Kazunari.

 **Everyone:** - _dead silent_ -

 **Akashi:** Good. Kuroko, I hope you at least doubled their score.

 **Midorima:** …

 **Kuroko:** ...

* * *

- _Game starts_ -

 **Akashi** : Seirin, what are you doing, letting them get the first shot? I'm disappointed.

 **Mibuchi:** ' _We also let_ _Seirin_ _score first during our match... but I won't remind him._ '

* * *

- _Ending song, special frame_ -

 **Akashi:** Why is he even featured there? Though I admit, he looks ridiculous.

 **Takao:** Pffft!

 **Midorima:** … you really hate being called a 'child' that much?

 **Akashi:** Of course, because it's not true.

 **Mibuchi:** -whispers to Midorima- It's the _height_.

 **Midorima:** ...


	8. Episode 7

**Episode 7:**

 **You'll See Something Amazing**

* * *

- _Game ends. Seirin wins.-_

 **Akashi:** Only a 12 point lead? Kuroko, I'm disappointed.

 **Kuroko:** ...

 **Aomine:** -yawns- Well, that was a pretty boring game. Also, Kagami only keeps jumping like a jack-in-the-box spring.

 **Murasakibara:** … I have a toy like that at home.

 **Himuro:** - _sweatdrops_ -

…

 **Takao:** Pfffft! Really, Shin-chan, 'bathroom break' my ass. Admit it, you were just watching their game! Hahahahahaha!

…

 **Murasakibara:** Muro-chin, that Papa is really the childish one, not me.

 **Himuro:** Y-yeah, of course, Atsushi.

* * *

- _Seirin gets t_ _wo_ _straight wins with Kuroko at the bench_ -

 **Imayoshi:** Ara? They are actually doing pretty good without the invisible kid.

 **Kuroko:** ...

* * *

- _Seirin wins against Meijo_ -

 **Kise:** I wonder what they were doing near Kaijo...

* * *

- _Kagami 'greets' Midorima_ -

 **Kise:** -snickers- For someone who claims he doesn't like Kuroko, you sure go to his games often.

 **Taka** **o** **:** Pfft! Rightly said. You know, Tsundere are supposed to be small and cute characters with a harsh mouth. But Shin-chan? _Really_. HAHAHAHAHA!

 **Midorima:** … That's a bunch of nonsense.

 **Everyone:** - _snickers_ -

* * *

- _Midorima asks to be in the line-up_ -

 **Imayoshi:** Arara, looks like their captain is also harsh. Is there a rule that captains should be scary?

 **Aomine:** As if you're not! You're plenty nasty as it is!

 **Imayoshi:** Ahaha! What are you saying, Aomine? I even let you off with your tardy records.

 **Akashi:** …

 **Hyuuga:** …

 **Ootsubo:** …

 **Kasamatsu:** …

 **Fukui:** Really? If that's the case, maybe I was better suited as the Captain.

 **Okamura:** You're so mean! Why does no one respect me as a Captain?

 **Fukui:** You are no longer one, idiot!

 **All 3** **rd** **years:** …

…

 **Takao:** Pffft! Really, Shin-chan, no matter how much I hear you say about your lucky item, it's still super funny.

* * *

- _Midorima makes a high-arc shot_ -

 **Takao:** No matter how many times I see it, it still looks ridiculous.

 **Akashi:** … If they were in Tokyo Dome, it should only take 6.76 seconds for the ball to go in. But they aren't even in Tokyo Dome, and basing on the height of the court, it should take less time. Midorima, how is it _possible_ that you had that 16 second conversation with Takao before the ball sunk in?

 **Midorima:** …

 **Miyaji:** Midorima, you brat! Are you trying to make us fail the exam?!

 **Midorima:** … excuse me?

 **Miyaji:** How are we going to answer the free fall equations now? How would we know if it follows the "Midorima Effect?"

 **Midorima:** …

 **Akashi:** …

 **Takao:** … shit, Shin-chan, you just made our high school life harder.

* * *

- _outside the court_ -

 **Aomine:** … Kagami, you really are an idiot.

 **Kagami:** What was that, Aomine bastard?


	9. Episode 8

**Episode 8:**

 **Now That I Think About It**

* * *

- _Lunch break_ -

 **Aomine:** ...You still eat like a girl, Tetsu.

 **Kuroko:** ... Please go back to sleep, Aomine-kun.

* * *

- _Takao_ _invites Midorima to watch some DVDs of Seiho's matches_ -

 **Takao:** I wonder if Shin-chan would have shown more interest if it was p*rn? What's your type, Shin-chan? Do you prefer older women, or younger? Ah, But I think Shin-chan is more into the nurse types. Ouch! Miyaji-senpai, what was that for?

 **Miyaji:** Moron! There's a girl in this room!

 **Takao:** Sorry, sorry, my bad.

 **Miyaji:** I'm sorry you have to hear that, Momoi-san.

 **Momoi:** Hm? Oh, don't mind me. I'm only interested in Tetsu-kun's preference.

 **Aida:** …

 **Hyuuga:** You idiots! Momoi is not the only one!

 **Ootsubo:** You're right. We're sorry, Mibuchi-san. Although you're male, you have a maiden's heart. You didn't have to hear that.

 **Mibuchi:** It' alright. I also want to know about Shin-chan's preference~ - _winks at Midorima_ -

 **Midorima:** - _shivers_ -

 **Aida:** - _chuckles darkly_ -

 **Hyuuga:** - _Sweatdrops_ -

* * *

- _Locker room_ -

 **Akashi:** Kuroko... does your misdirection also work on cameras?

 **Kuroko:** …

* * *

- _Teiko Days flashback, Kise gets scolded_ _by everyone_ -

 **Kise:** Kurokocchi! Why did you have to tell that embarrassing match to Kagamicchi?

 **Kasamatsu:** … ' _Maybe I should_ _have been nicer_ _him..._ _nah._ '

 **Aomine:** This Tsugawa guy...

 **Imayoshi:** Hm? Why are you staring at me? Do you need something, Aomine?

 **Aomine:** N-nothing!

* * *

- _Midorima and Takao continues watching Seiho's game_ -

 **Seirin team:** _'_ _Every last one of them is always belittling us!'_

* * *

- _Kise listens to Oha-Asa_ -

 **Akashi:** Kise, when did you start listening to Oha-Asa?

 **Midorima:** … comrade.

 **Kise:** …

* * *

- _Aida offers to kiss them as a reward if they win the game_ -

 **Mibuchi:** - _sweatdrops_ -

 **Every** **one else** **except Hyuuga:** - _bland expression_ -

 **Hyuuga:** - _mortified_ \- ' _What a blunder!_ _I forgot to collect my reward!_ '

 **Aida:** What's wrong with it, huh?!

 **Momoi:** … no appeal at all.

 **Aida:**...

* * *

- _During t_ _ime out,_ _Aida explains about Na_ _n_ _ba running_ _-_

 **Akashi:** To be more precise, Nanba walking is a traditional Japanese style of walking.

 **Kise:** Where did you learn that, Akashicchi?

 **Akashi:** If you're forced to wear a lot of formal kimono, you'll pick up a thing or two. Nanba walking is just one of them.

 **Murasakibara:** … sounds too troublesome.

 **Akashi:** But how come after having played them the year before, and after watching two boxes of DVDs, Aida-san only realized it now, while Kasamatsu-san immediately recognized it? Kuroko, I am starting to doubt your team.

 **Kuroko:** ...

* * *

- _Game resumes_ -

 **Midorima:** Figures the only thing Bakagami understood is 'winning'.

…

 **Kise:** There is really something wrong with that Tsugawa-guy. 'Fun and pain'? He really sounds like a cartoon villain.

* * *

- _Last picture_ -

 **Midorima:** Just to be clear, Kise, I don't swing your way.

 **Kise:** Huh?

* * *

.

.

.

 **PBJane:** Umm, yeah, I am posting one episode a day. But I'll take a little break after the 13th episode because I'm planning to make an interlude... not to mention I also have to update my other fic. A little trivia: I've read from the net that ordinary Japanese people from the old times walk in 'nanba' style because it's easier with their geta (elevated wooden shoes), and to avoid twisting and rumpling their clothes. Anyway, thanks for all the reviews!


	10. Episode 9

**Episode 9:**

 **To Win**

* * *

- _Midorima shoots in slow motion_ -

 **Akashi:** Midorima, how high do you jump when you do your shots?

 **Midorima:** Why do you ask that?

 **Akashi:** Because this time, your feet landed only after the ball had sunk in.

 **Midorima:** ...

* * *

- _Seirin vs Seiho game,_ _first quarter_ -

 **Murasakibara:** Ah, they pissed off Kuro-chin.

 **Momoi:** Kyaaaaah! Tetsu-kun's so cool!

 **Kise:** Go Kurokocchi! Owww! Senpai, what's that for?

 **Kasamatsu:** We watched that game, remember? What are you doing cheering only now?

 **Kise:** I've got an image to keep that time. But now, I can cheer to my heart's content! Go Kurokocchi!

* * *

- _Kasamatsu and Kise comments on Kagami and Kuroko's play_ -

 **Aomine:** … Jealous much, Kise?

 **Kise:** Yeah. Plenty jealous. I've always wanted to play with Kurokocchi.

 **Momoi:** ... - _hides Kuroko behind her_ -

 **Everyone:** ...

 **Kise:** Huh? What's wrong, everyone?

 **Everyone:** ... - _sweatdrops_ -

* * *

- _Second quarter_ -

 **Aomine:** - _yawns_ \- This is getting boring...

* * *

- _Aida calls for substitution_ -

 **Hayama:** Whoah, the only senpai that didn't get introduced finally joins the game! I wonder what kind of secret weapon he's hiding.

 **Mayuzumi:** … not to mention, he's the only Seirin member who didn't get to play in the Winter-Cup finals. Even the useless first years got their chance.

 **Tsuchida:** - _orz_ -

* * *

- _game resumes_ -

 **Wakamatsu** **:** … Did Hyuuga just shout, 'Let's go Seiho?'

 **Susa:** … He did.

 **Kimura** **:** ... and the Seiho crowd cheered.

 **Wakamatsu:** … Well, that was confusing.

 **Susa:** Could be interpreted as a challenge.

 **Kimura:** But normally, wouldn't it be 'come on', or 'bring it on' instead?

 **Wakamatsu:** …

 **Hayama:** Anyway, enough of that. Tsuchida-senpai is now playing, see?

 **Midorima:** Why are you adding 'senpai' when you're the same year?

 **Hayama:** Well, he's their senpai.

 **Midorima:** …

 **Hayama:** Awww, he got screened.

…

 **Wei Liu:** Is this 'Eagle Eye' part of thy 'chuunibyo' culture that is most known amongst thee and thine people?

 **Okamura:** Where did you learn about 'chuunibyo'? Anyway, there's also another one called the 'Hawk Eye'. I wonder how their eyes work.

 **Fukui:** Still, 'Emperor Eye' sounds the most ridiculous.

 **Wie Liu:** 'Emperor Eye' is most chuunibyo?

 **Fukui:** Yeah, you could say that.

 **Izuki:** ...

 **Takao:**...

 **Akashi:** ...

…

 **Mibuchi:** Koga-chan, your shots sucks.

 **Koganei:**!

…

 **Hayama:** … That's it? His super secret weapon is rebounding? I thought there would be more voosh, kazoom, pshaw, and sparkles. I'm disappointed.

 **Mibuchi:** I wonder what kind of ability is that...

 **Hayakawa:** Nic(e) reboun(d)! Yos(h)! Let's hav(e) mor(e) rebound(s)!

 **Kasamatsu:** Keh. He's also noisy. Is that the new requirement for being a rebounder?

 **Mayuzumi:** Seems so. Hanami*** Sakura** in Sl*m D*nk was also very noisy.

 **Tsuchida:** ...

* * *

- _Kuroko gets substituted back in_ -

 **Momoi:** Dai-chan, wake up! Tetsu-kun is back on court!

 **Aomine:** mmm... sh't up, Satsuki.

* * *

- _Last picture_ -

 **Murasakibara:** Are? Mine-chin, Mido-chin, Aka-chin, Kise-chin... ah, I even see Muro-chin's jersey. Everyone's there except for me. Why am I not there?

* * *

.

.

.

 **PBJane:** ChordOverstreetFan, I approve of that definition =w=b


	11. Episode 10

**Episode 10:**

 **I Can't Have That**

* * *

- _Tsugawa and Kuroko talks_ -

 **Wakamatsu:** … Huyyga, you can have Aomine. Let us have Kuroko.

 **Aomine:** Huh? Wha-

 **Momoi:** Tetsu-kun in Touou? Please do!

 **Aomine:** Oi!

* * *

- _Game resumes_ -

 **Kise:** Kagamicchi is slow. I realized Kurokocchi was amazing during our first real game together! I just got into first string back then. That game wa-

 **Kasamatsu:** Shut up, Kise!

…

 **Midorima:** Just when they said that they won't let them have it, they easily got passed and dunked over.

…

 **Akashi:** Quick thinking, Kuroko. As expected from my former pupil.

* * *

- _Seirin wins_ -

 **Hayama:** Dang, I thought that Tsuchida-senpai would at least get the last shot.

 **Kise:** Ara? Kagamicchi, why didn't you join them? Don't tell me, you were jealous that Kurokocchi got to play?

 **Kagami:** - _grumbles_ \- I was not.

* * *

- _Post-game line-up_ -

 **Takao:** … Did I just see Mitobe-san's mouth move? He was speaking, right? Hey, did you see that? I swear, if only you guys weren't being so loud, we could have solved this great mystery!

 **Midorima:** What mystery?

 **Takao:** Of course, it is the mystery of 'why Mitobe-san has a seiyuu even if he doesn't speak.' Do you think the producers are that generous that they'd pay for a seiyuu who has no speaking lines? Reality is harsh, man.

 **Midorima:** … what are you talking about, Takao?

* * *

- _Shuutoku game also finishes_ -

 **Takao:** Shin-chan smiled. It's not the haughty-I-am-higher-than-you-fools smile, but the _smile_ smile. I didn't know you could smile, Shin-chan. You always have that perpetual frown on your face. Maybe that's why you're not popular with girls.

 **Midorima:** … you talk too much, Takao.

* * *

- _team lockers_ -

 **Aomine:** 'Saving his every last bit of energy,' my ass. - _yawns_ \- He's just sleeping.

 **Wakamatsu:** And you're always lazing off! At least he _played_ in the game.

* * *

- _Midorima's monologue in the locker room_ -

 **Takao:** Pfffft! Even in his thoughts, Shin-chan is too serious! I understand that horoscopes are your things, but really, _nail care_? Really, your lashes are already long, and you're into horoscopes and _nail care._ Coupled with your selfish requests and your tsundere-ness, you're starting to sound like a girl! Hahahaha!

 **Midorima:** Shut-up, Takao! Oi, what are you doing? Where are you touching?!

 **Takao:** Just checking if you didn't grow breasts overnight. - _snickers_ -

 **Midorima:** - _vein pops_ \- Oi!

 **Everyone:** ...

* * *

- _Before line-up_ -

 **Takao:** Really, Shin-chan, why can't you be honest and say that you're glad to fight against Kuroko-kun? Just a little while ago, you were smiling. Then you're back to your grumpy self. You won't earn friends like that, Shin-chan.

 **Midorima:** … shut up!

 **Akashi:** Now now, don't drive away the only friend you have, _Shin-chan_.

 **Midorima:** Akashi! Why are you joining in?!

 **Akashi:** … tsk.

 **Takao:** - _snickers_ -

* * *

- _After the line up, and before the game start_ -

 **Takao:** … Oi, Kagami, what was that now, huh? That sounded so _wrong_. You badly want to do Shin-chan? This _Shin-chan_? Well, I won't question your tastes, choosing Shin-chan of all people, but he's still our _Shin-chan_ , and we can't have our Ace-sama in a pinch. Having said that, you have to go through the whole team first if you wanna touch our Shin-chan!

 **Kagami:** Huh? Wai-what? What did I do this time?

 **Akashi:** Kagami... basically, you sounded like you want to f*ck Midorima... nanodayo.

 **Kagami:** Whaaaaaat?!

 **Midorima:** - _Blanches_ -

 **Mibuchi:** … It doesn't help that Midorima was acting like a girl PMSing on her boyfriend.

 **Kagami:** - _W_ _hite as sheet_ -

 **A** **kashi:** … - _frowns_ \- ' _no one noticed it._ '

* * *

- _Seirin almost scored the first point_ -

 **Akashi:** I am sensing a pattern here... Every time Seirin thinks they've scored, it will turn out to be a fluke.

 **Kuroko:** … Please keep those kinds of observation to yourself, Akashi-kun.

* * *

- _Kuroko passes from one end of the court to another_ -

 **Akashi:** Kuroko, you could really summon that gust of wind?

 **Kuroko:** ...

* * *

- _Ending song, special frame_ -

 **Kimura:** Ootsubo and Miyaji are there... shouldn't I be there instead of Takao?

 **E** **veryone:** … ' _poor guy_ '

* * *

- _P_ _review_ -

 **Akashi:** … that was interesting nanodayo.

 **Takao:** You said so, nanodayo.

 **Midorima:** Stop imitating me!

 **Akashi:** But it's interesting, nanodayo.

 **Midorima:** … this is all your fault, Takao!

 **Takao:** - _snickers_ -

* * *

.

.

.

 **PBJane:** The thing about Midorima and Kagami might be a little hard to get for those who are not familiar with Nihonggo. Basically, Midorima refused to talk to someone 'pathetic' (a.k.a. Kagami), and so Kagami said this: "...I've got tons of pent-up frustration, so let's do this already..." Kagami's 'Hayaku yarou ze' sounds pretty suggestive, especially with how he said it. 'Yaru', or its presumptive form 'Yarou' plainly means 'let's do it', but it could also mean 'let's have sex' depending on the context.


	12. Episode 11

**Episode 11:**

 **It's Not Like That**

* * *

- _Title_ -

 **Kise** **:** - _snickers_ \- The title suits Midorimacchi so much.

 **Takao:** Pfft. Totally. Just add 'nanodayo' at the end. Hahahaha!

 **Akashi:** … It's not like that, nanodayo.

 **Everyone:** - _snickers_ -

 **Midorima:** ...

* * *

- _Game resumes_ -

 **Akashi:** This reminds me... how can your misdirection still work after a flashy pass like that? They are even comparing it to _The_ _Ichiro Suzuki's_ laserthrows. Kuroko, that's instant stardom nanodayo.

 **Midorima:** Stop imitating me already!

 **Akashi:** … che.

 **K** **uroko:** ...

 **Aomine:** Tetsu, wipe off that smug look on your face!

...

 **Akashi:** That's it. The moment Seirin said that it doesn't matter who marks Kuroko, something bad is bound to happen.

…

 **Momoi:** ...Takao-kun, don't tell me you're also after my Tetsu-kun?

 **Takao:** Huh? Where did that come from?

 **Kuroko:** You say such embarrassing things even if we've just met. Where did you even learn those things about me? Were you stalking me or something?

 **Momoi:** ...

 **Takao:** Hell no! Shin-chan talks about you, see? Even though he doesn't admit it, he keeps an eye on you.

 **Midorima:** … don't say such nonesense, Takao. I was merely passing by.

 **Momoi:** … Saying things like: 'it's fate', 'you and I are alike', 'I've never felt this before, there's something different about you,' ... sounds like some confession, right?

 **Takao:** Oi! You just ignored the part I said I hate him!

 **Momoi:** That doesn't even count. I know boys always tell the girls they like that they hate them. Then they tease them, bully them, call them fat and ugly, then pull on their hair.

 **Takao:** What am I, a grade schooler?! Wait, that's not even the issue! Really, I'm not into guys! Shin-chan, help me out here, will you?

 **Midorima:** ... Takao, don't come near me.

 **Momoi:** Well then, Takao-kun... shall we settle this matter elsewhere?

 **Takao:** Oi! Shin-chan! Dammit, Kuroko, tell her it's just a misunderstanding. Oi, don't just disappear like that!

…

 **Akashi:** … I thought eagles have better vision than hawks.

 **Izuki and Takao:** ...

* * *

- _Seirin time out_ -

 **Akashi:** See, something bad did happen. Seirin first years, you shouldn't jinx your own team.

…

 **Kise:** Aww, Midorimacchi was just concerned about Kurokocchi. In tsundere language, 'I don't like' means 'I like.'

 **Akashi:** You should have just told him instead of antagonizing him, Midorima; you won't earn any friends that way.

 **Takao:** Pffffffft!

 **Midorima:** ...

* * *

- _Hyuuga and Aida's flashback_ -

 **Murasakibara:** What a waste. You should have given them to me instead of breaking them.

…

 **Akashi:** You can have my title, Aida-san. I insist. It suits you better.

 **Aida:** ...

* * *

- _Game resumes_ -

 **Aomine:** What are you doing just standing there, Bakagami? The guy's tellin ya he was shooting, and you just stood there like a dumb-struck idiot.

 **Kagami:** Aomine, you bastard! C'mon, let's have a 1-on-1! I'll show you who's dumb!

 **Aomine:** Huuuh? You're a hundred years too early to defeat me.

 **Kagami:** Oh yeah? Prove it.

 **Aomine:** Fine. 1-on-1, outside, now.

 **Akashi:** … I didn't give you permission to leave. Are you going to defy me?

 **Kagami and Aomine:** Eeeek!

...

 **Murasakibara:** Nee, Mido-chin, why did you hesitate to shoot before if you know that your threes are greater than Kagami's twos?

 **Midorima:** …

* * *

- _GOM flashback_ -

 **Takao:** Are you guys really buddies? You guys are too far from each other, and each one is looking a different way. So cold.

* * *

- _Game resumes_ -

 **Mibuchi:** Ah, Taiga-chan broke. Tsk tsk tsk, you shouldn't have broken his heart, Shin-chan~

 **Midorima:** ...

* * *

- _Last Picture_ -

 **Takao:** Even though we're basketball partners, I'm not into you, okay Shin-chan?

 **Midorima:** I know. You're interested in Kuroko.

 **Takao:** Huh?! No way!

 **Momoi:** Takao-kun...

 **Takao:** Eeeep!

 **Kuroko:** ...


	13. Episode 12

**Episode 12:**

 **What is Victory**

* * *

- _Kise accidentally drops his phone, and Oha-Asa plays_ -

 **Midorima:** … Do you want me to give you your lucky item next time? Don't worry, I won't ask for any compensation. You're our comrade anyway.

 **Kise:** ...

* * *

- _Half-time break, in Seirin lockers_ -

 **Everyone:** ' _Good job, Hyuuga. You stopped her from suggesting it again._ '

...

 **Akashi:** Kuroko, a meteor of that size will probably obliterate the whole stadium. That's roughly the same amount of energy released by a magnitude 6 earthquake compressed into one small space rock.

 **Everyone:** …

 **Akashi:** …But that is not my main concern. Kuroko, I know that being a teenager is hard. I know that it's especially hard for you because you are always getting ignored, or forgotten. Wishing for a meteor to fall, or some natural disaster to obliterate human pests, is kind of concerning- though I won't mind it as long as you exclude me on your list to eliminate. But anyway, if you really feel the need to talk to someone, you can always talk to me anytime.

 **Everyone:** ' _Oi, he's the one_ _who_ _needs more help here!_ '

 **Kuroko:** … I'm sorry. I understand, Akashi-kun.

 **Everyone:** ' _He's going along with it?!_ '

 **Akashi:** Good. I know that you're always a reasonable one, Kuroko.

 **Everyone:** ...

* * *

- _Back in the court_ -

 **Koganei:** The coaches are...

 **Mitobe:** … ' _telepathic._ '

 **Koganei:** Right.

 **Everyone:** …

…

 **Kise** **:** … Midorimacchi, was that a pick-up line?

 **Kagami:** - _blanches_ -

 **Midorima:** Obviously it's not!

 **Aomine:** - _yawns_ \- Right. They are way past that. After all, Kagami just asked him two episodes ago if they can have se-

 **Kagami:** Shut up! It's not like that, bastard!

…

 **Murasakibara:** Now Kagami's jumping all over the place. Why can't he stay still for a moment? It pisses me off watching him. Makes me wanna crush him.

 **Himuro:** Ahaha...

…

 **Miyaji:** Kaaah! He's becoming as annoying as Midorima. Even if he's in the other team, I really want to hit him! Kimura, lend me that pineapple, will you?

 **Kagami:** …!

* * *

- _Third quarter break_ -

 **Akas** **hi:** … Kuroko, seems that you had a tough time.

 **Kuroko:** Yeah. We've only just become shadow and light that time, so we're not that bonded. To be honest, it's a little embarrassing that everyone's watching this now. I haven't even let my parents watch this yet.

 **Everyone:** ' _Oi, oi, what kind of talk is this?_ '

 **Akashi:** Don't be. We've been friends since Middle School, and I also taught you a thing or two that helped you become a better shadow.

 **Kuroko:** Yeah, but my former light is also here. It could be a little awkward. He doesn't get along with my current light.

 **Akashi:** Well, that happens. But I'm here, so it's going to be fine. He won't try something funny. How's your current light?

 **Kuroko:** As you can see in the video, he can be a huge idiot at times. I still get embarrassed for him when he acts that childish.

 **Akashi:** You sure have a knack for picking those types of _lights_.

 **Kuroko:** Don't remind me. I don't like talking about my former light. Their types are handful, but they're good at what they do.

 **Everyone:** ' _What's this, girl friends_ _BSing about their boyfriends behind their backs_ _?_ _And both their expressions are too flat!_ '

 **Kuroko:** How about you, Akashi-kun? How's your team?

 **Akashi:** - _sigh_ \- They could get a bit rowdy and handful, but that's part of being a captain. At least they are more obedient than other teams. My vice-captain also helps me around. How about you, Kuroko? Do you have plans on being a captain?

 **Kuroko:** I do. But I feel too young and inexperienced. Maybe next year. But right now, my hands are full supporting my light, I can't imagine doing it for a whole team.

 **Everyone:** ' _Now it's housewife talk?!_ '

 **Akashi:** Well, a team could be hard to manage at first, but you'll get used to it. Anyway, you're still young, and you've still got a year.

 **Everyone:** ' _As if you're not both of the same age!_ '

 **Kuroko** : Thank you for your guidance, Akashi-kun.

 **Akashi:** Anytime, Kuroko.

 **Everyone:** ' _There are so many things I_ _could_ _say,_ _but I'm too scared of Akashi!_ '

* * *

- _Last Picture_ -

 **Aomine:** -snickers-

 **Takao:** Pffft!

 **Kuroko:** Congr-

 **Kagami:** Shut up!

 **Midorima:** Cut it out already!

 **Akashi:** … As a friend, I'm happy for you, Midorima.

 **Midorima:** ...

* * *

.

.

.

 **PBJane:** ... I just realized that I confused Nebuya for Hayama the previous chapters OTL. Anyway, that's been corrected (hopefully I caught everything). Also, I have a story idea in my profile. I really can't write it, but it's been torturing my mind (someone save me! T^T). Anyway just PM me if you want to take it so I can erase it from my profile. Thanks.


	14. Episode 13

**Episode 13:**

 **I Believed in You**

* * *

- _Fourth quarter_ -

 **Murasakibara:** Whaaai, I don't really get Izuki's blabbering, but Kuro-chin finally passed Takao. Oi, Mine-chin, don't take my potato chips!

 **Aomine:** Keh. Stingy.

…

 **Murasakibara:** He just dunked over you, Mido-chin.

 **Midorima:** Like how he meteor-jammed above your head, Murasakibara.

 **Aomine:** And how he meteor-jammed above Akashi first thing into the game.

 **Midorima:** … you shouldn't have said the last one.

 **SFX:** - _snip snip_ -

 **Everyone:** ' _I thought he_ _was_ _already back to his original self!_ '

…

 **Takao:** Really? Only the Generation of Miracles could catch his pass? So, you've caught some of it, Shin-chan?

 **Midorima:** Of course.

 **Takao:** But how about your nails? Won't it destroy your carefully-and-borderline-obsessively-trimmed nails?

 **Midorima:** ...

* * *

- _Aomine and Momoi's first appearance_ -

 **Wakamatsu:** … I really want to hit him right now.

 **Aomine:** !

 **Murasakibara:** Mine-chin, you're starting to sound like me. Somehow, it pisses me off...

 **Akashi:** That's why Kuroko left you for another light because you're acting like a spoiled child.

 **Kuroko: -** _flat_ **-** Mou, don't remind me, Akashi-kun.

 **Everyone:** … ' _They're still at it!?_ '

* * *

- _Shuutoku time out_ -

 **Takao:** Don't worry, Shin-chan. Even if your shots are way too ridiculous, they are still inspiring. And not to mention heartbreaking. Hahahaha!

 **Midorima:** …

…

 **Wen Liu:** Generation of Miracles are like rare animals?

 **Fukui:** Yeah, you could say that.

 **Murasakibara:** Hm? Why are you staring at me, Liu-chin?

 **Wen Liu:** … Rare animals indeed.

 **Murasakibara:** ?

* * *

- _Last three seconds_ -

 **Akashi:** I knew that the moment they believed that they had already won, they had just jinxed themselves.

...

 **Kise:** And I also believed in Kurokocchi who believed in Midorimacchi who believed in Kagamicchi!

 **Kasamatsu:** Shut up, Kise! This isn't Teng**n Topp* Gure* Laga*!

 **Akashi:** … 3 seconds was supposed to be long up while Midorima was delivering his very long winding speech.

 **Midorima:** …

* * *

- _Midorima under the rain_ -

 **Takao:** Aww, Shin-chan is crying.

 **Midorima:** I'm not!

* * *

- _Aomine on the phone with Midorima-_

 **Kise:** Aominecchi, you're a tall, dark, and intimidating guy, and you sound scary and serious, but really, with a pink phone... a pink phone... - _snickers_ \- yeah, the pink phone completely ruined the image.

 **Aomine:** Shut up, Kise!

* * *

- _Ending song_ -

 **Akashi:** This is the last time this will be played, right?

 **Midorima:** Yeah.

 **Akashi:** Good.

 **Kuroko:** … you're just jealous I look taller in the ending.

 **Akashi:** What was that, Kuroko?

 **Kuroko:** … Nothing.

* * *

- _Ending song special frame_ -

 **Momoi:** I... I want a poster of Tetsu-kun like that!

* * *

- _Preview_ -

 **Momoi:** Kyaaah! Tetsu-kun sounds soooo cute!

 **Everyone:** - _sweatdrops_ -

* * *

- _Last picture-_

 **Takao:** -"Glasses Man?" -snickers- Kuroko-kun, your tastes are good. But it would have been better if you found a shirt with "Tsundere Man" on it. Hahahaha!

 **Kise:** Are? No one is commenting about them being close?

 **Midorima:** What are you saying, Kise? Putting aside the fact that I'm straight, what you're suggesting is just not possible because our signs don't match.

 **Kuroko:** ... Yes. Cancer and Aquarius don't mix well.

 **Kise:** - _sulks_ \- so unfair.

 **Midorima:** If you're jealous, just say so.

 **Kise:** I am, but-

 **Everyone:** -stares-

 **Kise:** Oi, I don't mean it _that_ way!


	15. Interlude: Lunch Break

**Warning:** Crack and OOCness ahead. You may just skip this chapter if you're not comfortable with it.

* * *

 **Interlude (Day 1 Lunch Break):**

 **You're Never Too Old To...**

* * *

- _TV room_ -

 **Aomine:** Ah, I'm hungry.

 **Akashi:** It's about time we have a break. It's already lunch time.

 **Aomine:** What? Already?

 **Akashi:** Yes. We've been watching for around 5 hours.

 **Kagami:** Akashi, is there some fast food near here?

 **Akashi:** Yes, there are some, but today I made arrangements for lunch. It should be ready by now in the backyard.

 **Kagami:** Yoshaa! Lucky~! I hope there are burgers.

 **Akashi:** I'm sure there will be.

* * *

- _walking towards the backyard_ -

 **Hyuuga:** \- _whispers_ \- Oi, Kuroko, are you sure it's okay?

 **Kuroko:** what's okay?

 **Hyuuga:** \- _whispers_ \- You know, Akashi treating us for lunch. We did beat his team during Winter Cup, so...

 **Kuroko:** Akashi-kun isn't the type to hold grudges over that.

 **Izuki:** So, have you ever tried eating over Akashi's?

 **Kuroko:** Yes. A few times.

 **Koganei:** - _whistles_ \- You know, his house is very impressive. I wonder what kind of meals he is used to.

 **Kuroko:** It's pretty much normal.

 **Koganei:** Really?

 **Kuroko:** What were you expecting?

 **Koganei:** I don't know. Something with many sizes of spoons and shiny knives, I guess.

 **Kagami:** Who cares, as long as it's food?

* * *

- _Just as they entered the backyard_ -

 **Tronald WcDonald** **Mascot** **:** Hey Kids! Let's all have some fun to- sorry, a moment please...

 **Tronald WcDonald** **Mascot** **: -** _to another staff_ _out of sight_ _-_ Oi, Fujimura, you got the address wrong!

 **WcDonald Staff (Fujimura):** No I didn't! Besides, this is the only mansion in this area!

 **Tronald WcDonald** **Mascot** **:** Then there must be some mistake! There are no kids here but two, and the rest of them are friggin' huge! One of them is even around 2 meters tall!

 **WcDonald Staff (Fujimura):** But the nameplate at the gate says 'Akashi', so this must be the place! And mind your language, or the boss will hear it!

 **Tronald WcDonald** **Mascot** **: -** _grumbles_ -

 **A** **kashi:** _Ahem_. I'm Akashi Seijuurou. I'm the one who organized this event.

 **Tronald WcDonald Mascot: -** _takes out a piece of paper from his pocket_ **-** Yeah, it's the right name alright. Should we start from the very top?

 **Akashi:** … nevermind.

 **Everyone:**...' _He looks regretful!_ '

 **Tronald WcDonald Mascot:** - _shrugs_ \- alright, kid. You sure got weird friends here. You should have invited your classmates, or your playmates, or something.

 **Akashi:** No, it's alright. They're my playmates. My other playmates are too old.

 **Everyone:** ' _Now, he's_ _alright with being called a 'kid'?!_ '

 **Tronald WcDonald Mascot:** … You sure, kid? I dunno, some of them looks scary, especially that guy with forked eyebrows. You sure they aren't troubling you and your friend here? I could call the cops if you want.

 **Akashi:** It's alright. I have it all under control.

 **Everyone:** ' _He's the most dangerous one here!_ '

 **Tronald WcDonald Mascot:** You're a weird kid, but you're okay.

 **Akashi:** And you're a strange Tronald. But you're interesting.

 **Tronald WcDonald Mascot:** - _shrugs_ \- Everyone tells me that. Anyway, this way...

 **Everyone:** ' _Someone tell me how did he become a mascot_ _for children_ _?_ _'_

 **Akashi:** You are aware that I can lead myself around my own home, right?

 **Tronald WcDonald Mascot:** Yeah, but it's in the script. Boss'll yell at me if I don't follow it. He's a grouchy fellow.

 **Everyone:** ' _Oi, you're BSing your boss too much! And you're_ _even_ _complaining in front of your clients!_ _You'll definitely be fired!_ '

 **Akashi:** Alright then, lead the way.

 **Hyuuga:** This isn't...

 **Koganei:** … what I was expecting.

 **Mitobe:**...

 **Kagami:** Who cares, as long as there's free food.

 **Kiyoshi:** Hahahaha!

* * *

 **-** _At the venue_ **-**

 **Tronald WcDonald Mascot:** Oi, Fujimura, they're here!

 **WcDonald Staff (Fujimura):** Ah, welco- woah! They're huge!

 **Tronald WcDonald Mascot:** Told you so.

 **WcDonald Staff (Fujimura):** Anyway, we've got party hats over here, and Aiko-chan there could make you some balloon hats if you want. Let's all have fun, okay?

 **Everyone:**...

 **Kagami:** Great, they've got unlimited burgers! Let's go guys!

 **Everyone:** '... _you're too simple minded, Kagami._ '

 **Kuroko:** Akashi-kun, I'm not a kid.

 **Akashi:** They also serve vanilla milkshakes.

 **Kuroko:** ... I'm still a child, by legal definition.

 **Everyone:** ' _He got easily swayed!_ '

 **Momoi:** Tetsu-kun, reserve the seat next to you, okay? I'll go get some balloon hats. I'm sure Tetsu-kun will look very cute with a bunny one. Kyaaaah! Let's have matching hats! I'll go get some now!

 **Everyone:** ' _She's got other motives!_ '

 **Murasakibara:** Muro-chin, they have snacks over there...

 **Himuro:** - _sweatdrops_ \- Atsushi, they're prizes for the parlor games. You can't have them.

 **Murasakibara: -** _eyes lit with fire_ **-** Nee, Muro-chin, let's join the games.

 **Everyone:** ... ' _There's the biggest kid!_ '

 **Midorima:** Hmph. It's not like I want to have a party with everyone, but let's get it over with.

 **Everyone:** ' _He totally wants_ _to_ _!_ '

 **Kise:** A-Ah, sounds fun. L-let's go!

 **Aomine:** Y-yeah!

 **Everyone:** ' _It sounds too forced!_ _The rest of the GoM are too scared to go against Akashi!_ '

 **Akashi:** - _smiles_ \- What are you waiting for? The program's about to start.

 **Everyone:**... ' _Oi,_ _you_ _'re acting way_ _out of character! And_ _when did you get that crown balloon hat?!_ '

* * *

- _In the middle of the program_ -

 **Tronald WcDonald Mascot:** So, before we eat, let's sing our celebrant a happy birthday.

 **Everyone:** ' _Birthday?! Whose birthday?_ '

 **Kuroko:** Your birthday is on December, Akashi-kun.

 **Akashi:** It's not for me, it's for Wakamatsu-san. His birthday is in three weeks, right?

 **Wakamatsu:** H-how did you know?

 **Everyone:** ' _And_ _it's way too early to be celebrating it!_ '

 **Tronald WcDonald Mascot:** Oi, why is no one singing? Can't you guys even sing such a simple song? Really, kids are much better than you. Fine, if you guys refuse to sing, let's just go on with the cake. Jeez.

 **Everyone:** … ' _There's really something wrong with this mascot character! And wait, there's_ _even_ _a cake?!_ '

 **Tronald WcDonald Mascot:** - _To Akashi_ \- Here kid, go blow your cake.

 **Kuroko:** Akashi-kun, I thought this birthday party is for Wakamatsu-senpai.

 **Wakamatsu:** ' _not that I am even aware of it, or even want it._ '

 **Akashi:** I'm blowing it by proxy.

 **Wakamatsu:** ' _Thank gods and_ _B_ _uddha that I'll not be the one to do it._ '

 **Kuroko:** … the name on the cake clearly reads 'Seijuurou.'

 **Akashi:** Well, I accidentally wrote my name on the paper.

 **Everyone: '** _The Great Akashi-Sama is incapable of doing such trivial mistakes!_ _Just admit it, it's for yourself!_ _'_

 **Kuroko:** … Fine. I just wanted to blow it.

 **Everyone:** ' _That's his problem?!_ '

 **Akashi:** Okay, I'll leave one candle for you.

 **Kuroko:** What about Wakamatsu-senpai?

 **Wakamatsu:** D-don't bother about me. Really, you could blow all the candles you want and even eat the whole cake.

 **Kuroko:** Okay, if you're sure.

 **Murasakibara:** … I want the flower candies.

 **Everyone:** - _sweatdrops_ -

* * *

- _Back to the TV room_ -

 **Kagami:** Ah, I'm full!

 **Murasakibara:** That's was fun! I won plenty!

 **Everyone:** ' _For Pete's sake, y_ _ou went into ZONE!_ '

 **Midorima:** -shifts glasses- It was troublesome, but I won't mind having another one.

 **Everyone:** ' _The socially-_ _challenged_ _tsundere_ _actually wants another_ _party_ _?!_ '

 **Mibuchi:** So, Sei-chan, why WcDonalds?

 **Akashi:** Why not? Their poster says, 'You're never too old to have fun at WcDonalds.' Besides, they are the largest and one of the most popular fast food chain, so there won't be a problem with our different tastes.

 **Mibuchi:** Your reasons are sound. But why a party? You could have just, you know, order take-out like normal.

 **Akashi:** … are you questioning my decision?

 **Mibuchi:** N-no. F-forget it, it's nothing!

 **Akashi:** good.

 **Everyone:** …

…

 **Kagami:** Oi, Kuroko, why is my seat full of milkshakes?!

 **Kuroko:** Oh, it's you Kagami-kun. You could just sit on the floor. It's clean.

 **Kagami:** … KUROKO!

* * *

 **OMAKE 1**

 **Mibuchi:** So, Tetsu-chan, do you know the reason why Sei-chan organized this party? A _children_ 's party, mind you.

 **Kuroko:** You didn't know? Well, he's never tried WcDonalds, or had kiddy parties. His birthdays are always celebrated together with Christmas, and it's always a formal affair for them.

 **Mibuchi:** I see... poor Sei-chan...

 **Kuroko:** … I think that you will be in a more pitiable situation.

 **Mibuchi:** What do you mean?

 **Kuroko:** Well, back in middle school, he had a K*C party. And because they said, 'Invite your friends and have fun,' he also invited all his shogi _playmates,_ and most of them were already over 30 years old, and a few were even older than 50. Also, he used to force us to accompany him to different fast-food chains. One time, he dragged us to Subw*y, and when asked for the toppings, he replied with 'everything on the menu'. His sandwich was... well, _huge_. In the end, we got Murasakibara-kun to finish it. Then there was also one time he dragged us to T*co Be...

 **Mibuchi:** … - _sweatdrops_ -

* * *

 **OMAKE 2**

 **Midorima:** Akashi...

 **Akashi:** I know. You're asking for the estimate of the expenses and my advice, right?

 **Midorima:** …

 **Akashi:** Well, you're only a few in your team, so I suggest you get their package *. The food choices are good, it's 30 pax, and it's pretty affordable.

 **Midorima:** … okay.

 **Akashi:** … Don't forget to invite us if ever you've decided to have one.

 **Midorima:** … sure.

 **Akashi:** And try having B*rdie or Hamb*rglar for the mascot. I also want to see them in person.

 **Midorima:** … you have my word.

 **Akashi:** Good. We have a deal then.

* * *

.

.

.

 **PBJane:** As to how this all happened, let's just say I chance upon a crack fanmade vid in Youtube about some training camp night, and Akashi was very... hyperactive? Oh, and too much Gintama stupidity. Anyway, I just had to write this.

As for how Tronald Mascot can see Kuroko, let's just say he's used to handling pesky kids who like to play 'hide from the adults'.

Also, I am also going to take a break (as I've announced before). So the next update will probably be in a week... or so. I still plan to finish all 75 episodes, or at least up to episode 25, but updates from now on will just be spontaneous. I'm sorry. It's a bummer, I know =3= Really, why can't there be a BA Fanfiction? I would certainly get some honors if that were so. Che =3=

Lastly, if someone's interested with that idea in my profile, or knows where in all the forums I could place it, please PM me. I badly want it out of my system. Haha!


	16. Episode 14

**Episode 14**

 **You Look Just Like Him**

* * *

 _-Second Opening Song-_

 **Kuroko:** …Akashi-kun, please go away.

 **Akashi:** …

 **Mibuchi:** Umm... any reason why, Tetsu-chan?

 **Kuroko:** See that frame there where there's only the two of us? Your presence makes me look lame. Please don't stick too close to me next time. You're better off standing next to Murasakibara-kun.

 **Akashi:** …

 **Mibuchi:** ...

…

 **Momoi:** … I should have been there instead of Riko-san if they want fan service. Riko-san looks too boyish. Do guys nowadays like boyish-looking girls? They should pick real boys instead if that's what they want. Hmph!

 **Hyuuga:** ...

 **Kiyoshi:** Don't mind it, Hyuuga. I've always known that you're a bi.

 **Hyuuga:** I'm not!

 **Izuki:** Cam down, Hyuuga. He only means bipolar. - _whispers_ \- I don't think he knows the term _bi_.

 **Kiyoshi:** Hn? But I do. And I exactly mean it that way.

 **Hyuuga and Izuki:** ...

…

 **Susa:** … I was Touou's vice captain, but I am the only one missing in the team picture.

 **Everyone:** … ' _He has no misdirection but he's forgotten! He's even more unfortunate than Kuroko who_ _was_ _forgotten in Basketball Monthly!_ '

...

 **Akashi:** They made me look like some evil mastermind. Am I really that scary?

 **Everyone:** … ' _YES!_ '

 **Mibuchi: -** _sweat drops-_ Ahahaha, of course not, Sei-chan.

…

 **Akashi:** Kuroko...

 **Kuroko:** Please don't say anything more, Akashi-kun.

 **Akashi:** … che.

* * *

 _-The main Seirin players decide by Janken who will carry Kagami-_

 **Aomine:** Are your first years really that useless? They're even making tired players carry the idiot. And they made Tetsu carry him? Come on, the little guy's got no stamina and muscle mass!

 **Kuroko:** Please keep your mouth shut, Aomine-kun.

 **Furihata, Fukuda, and Kawahara:** ...

* * *

 _-Inside Okonomiyaki Restaurant: Midorima and Takao enters-_

 **Akashi:** Midorima, I thought Cancers ranked first that day?

 **Midorima:** It's because Kagami was there!

 **Akashi:** So, it's Kagami's fault why the rain suddenly came crashing down at you.

 **Midorima:** Of course! It's all his fault!

 **Akashi:** ...

* * *

 _-Inside Okonomiyaki Restaurant...-_

 **Aomine:** … It's a double date

 **Murasakibara:** It is?

 **Akashi:** It is.

 **Midorima:** It isn't!

 **Kagami:** Hell, no way!

 **Kuroko:** Kise-kun, please don't come near me.

 **Kise:** -whines- Kurokocchiiiii!

...

 **Mibuchi:** Shin-chan, why are you still playing basketball if you don't think it's fun?

 **Midorima:** ...

 **Some:** … ' _Is it because he doesn't have friends asides from Takao?_ '

 **Others:** … ' _Or is he just keeping up with his tsundere character?_ '

 **Kiyoshi:** - _pats Midorima's back_ \- It's alright.

 **Midorima:** ...

…

 **Akashi:** Shin-chan, you shouldn't beat up your only friend.

 **Midorima:** ...

...

 **Rakuzan team:** ' _Basketball is fun?! No way! It's friggin' scary!_ '

 **Akashi:** Hm?

 **Nebuya:** N-nothing!

...

 **Aomine:** … Somehow, it pisses me to be compared with Kagami. He's loud, a glutton, and a basketball idiot.

 **Wakamatsu** **:** You're the same, idiot!

* * *

- _Nigou makes his debut_ -

 **Akashi:** Kuroko, where's your dog?

 **Kuroko:** He's with my grandmother.

 **Akashi:** … Bring Tetsuya Nigou next time.

 **Kuroko:** - _looks suspiciously at Akashi_ \- … Ok.

* * *

- _Seirin practice_ -

 **Izuki:** Kagami, are you scared of dogs because you're a Taiga?

 **Kagami:** Huh?

 **Izuki:** You know, a Taiga (Tiger), the huge cat.

 **Hyuuga:** Die, Izuki.

...

 **Akashi:** I can't believe that Kagami defeated Kise.

 **Mibuchi:** Hm? Why?

 **Akashi:** He's supposed to be afraid of dogs.

 **Kise:** Eh? What does that mean, Akashicchi?

 **Kagami:** ...

…

 **Momoi:** Kyaaah! Tetsu-kun's puppy eyes! - _nose bleeds_ -

 **Aomine:** Tetsu, did Akashi teach you more than just passing? When did you develop a sadistic streak?

 **Tetsuya:** - _smirk_ -

* * *

- _Seirin Pool Training: Momoi appears_ -

 **Everyone except GoM:** -whistles-

 **Momoi** : -smirks triumphantly-

 **Aida:** -vein pops-

* * *

- _Seirin Pool Training-_

 **Moriyama:** Momoi-san, I can give you all the Ice Popsicles you want. Why not go out with me instead~?

 **Momoi:** I'm sorry, Moriyama-san. Tetsu-kun's Popsicle stick is all I want.

 **Everyone:** … ' _That sounded so wrong!_ '

…

 **Furihata, Fukuda, and Kawahara:** … ' _Momoi-san_ _forgot_ _about_ _us!_ '

 **Hayama:** Momoi-san, how could you forget about their special skills? Koganei-senpai could shoot anywhere, and that's awesome! And Tsuchida-senpai is a rebounder like Hanami*** Sakura**!

 **Midorima** **:** As I've said before, why are you still addressing them as senpai?

 **Hayama:** Hahaha! Don't sweat the details, Shin-chan!

 **Akashi:** … He's right, don't be such a nit-picker, _Shin-chan_.

 **Takao:** Pffft! I'm starting to like your former captain, Shin-chan.

 **Midorima:** … TAKAO!

 **Furihata, Fukuda, and Kawahara:** …

* * *

- _GoM Flashback: Teikou Days-_

 **Takao:** Pfffft! Shin-chan, now you're the one spouting embarrassing lines!

 **Midorima:** Shut up, Takao.

 **Hayama:** Eh? But I thought Shin-chan's lines sounded cool! Light and shadow or something.

 **Midorima:** … Please stay out of this, Hayama-san.

 **Akashi:** No, Shin-chan's lines are just plainly embarrassing.

 **Micorima:** …

 **Takao:** Pfffft!

 **Midorima:** TAKAO!

* * *

- _Aomine beats Kagami in their 1-on-1 match_ -

 **Takao:** Now it's Aomine saying those embarrassing lines.

 **Wakamatsu:** - _to Aomine_ \- Idiot. And you don't look like a 'Light'. Your appearance screams 'Shadow', 'Dark', 'Evil', and 'Ganguro'.

 **Aomine:** Oi, that last one was unnecessary!

…

 **Akashi:** Kuroko, you're right. Your current and former light really don't get along. But you're partly to blame because you just went off so sudden. I think Aomine was pretty confused, and perhaps even hurt when you suddenly left. That's why now he's taking it on your current light.

 **Kuroko:** … I'm sorry. I'll try to end things properly next time.

 **Everyone:** ...

* * *

 _-Ending Song-_

 **Takao:** Shin-chan, you really look like some smart and evil anime dude in that pose. I can even imagine you holding a black notebook with the words D**th N*te" on the cover, if only you were holding a pen instead of a nail file. Of all things, why a nail file?

 **Midorima:** ...

…

 **Akashi:** If it's not darkened, or distant shots, they keep on doing close-ups of me. Was I that unfriendly? When am I going to have my proper appearance?

 **Everyone:** ...

 **Kagami:** … ' _You were beyond unfriendly! You were homicidal!_ '

* * *

 _-Ending special frame-_

 **Kise:** Kurokocchi, when did you start living with Kagamicchi?

 **Momoi:** !

* * *

 _-Last Picture-_

 **Momoi:** … Dai-chan, don't tell me, you also have a thing for Tetsu-kun?

 **Aomine:** Huh? No way! The only thing I have for is Mai-chan's boobs!


	17. Episode 15

**Episode 15:**

 **Don't Make Me Laugh**

* * *

 _-Opening Song-_

 **Akashi:** It seems that they changed part of the intro sequence.

…

 **Momoi:** See? They added me. And I am more suited to be the heroine than Seirin's barely B-cup coach. Besides, this show is called 'Kuroko no Basuke', so it makes sense that the heroine would be _me,_ Tetsu-kun's girlfriend~

 **Kuroko:** …

…

 **Susa:** … They still didn't add me in Toou team's picture.

 **Everyone:** ' _Poor guy!_ '

 **Sakurai:** I'm sorry! I'm so sorry, senpai! I didn't mean to take your slot! I'm sorry for my existence!

 **Susa:** - _sweat drops_ -

…

 **Akashi:** … Kuroko, it would have been more clever if you stood between Koganei-san and Izuki-san, and not between the two tallest members of your team.

 **Kuroko:** …

* * *

- _To_ _u_ _ou lunch break_ -

 **Sakurai:** I'm sorry! I'm sorry! It's because I didn't prepare a bigger lunch that time isn't it? I'm so sorry! I should have made enough for the whole team! I'm so sorry!

 **Wakamatsu:** …Calm down, Sakurai. It's not your fault.

 **Sakurai:** But it's my fault that Aomine-san had hit Wakamatsu-senpai! I'm so sorry!

 **Wakamatsu:**...

 **Kasamatsu:** ...

 **Aomine:** Oww! Kasamatsu, you bastard! What was that for?

 **Miyaji:** Mind who you're talking to, brat! Didn't your mother teach you to use proper honorifics, _huuuuh_?!

 **Aomine:** Ita- Oi, this is a damn pineapple, you bastard!

 **Hyuuga:** - _clutch mode_ \- Huuuh?! Is that how you treat a senpai, you _twat_?! _On your knees_ and _beg_ for pardon _._

 **Kasamatsu:** -cracks knuckles- Just because you're another team's ace doesn't mean you'll be overlooked.

 **Miyaji:** Prepare yourself.

 **Aomine:** !

 **Imayoshi:** Ahaha! - _suddenly serious_ \- Don't go easy on him, guys. He deserves it.

 **Akashi:** … Rest in peace, Aomine Daiki.

* * *

- _GoM Flashback Teikou Days_ -

 **Murasakibara:** Ara? Sacchin, who's that guy you're talking to again? I can't remember him...

 **Momoi:** Hm? Oh, he was just there. I wonder, who is he again?

 **Midorima:** … I can't remember either.

 **Aomine:** Same here.

 **Akashi:** … He's _that_. One of the unnamed and faceless extras.

 **Kise:** Oh! Yeah, I heard they use those in comics and shows for character development.

 **Kuroko:** Momoi-san, you shouldn't talk to strangers.

…

 **Takao** **:** Pfffft! So you're saying that the reason why the GoM are constantly PMSing is because they hit puberty?

 **Kuroko:** … Yes.

 **GoM:** ...

…

 **Wakamatsu:** So, our Aomine used to be that cute? Now he's just a lazy, uncouth, and violent bastard.

 **Kuroko:** But he's calmed down a little after being defeated by us, right?

 **Wakamatsu:** I guess that's a positive way to look at it. But we'll definitely win next time.

 **Aomine:** ...

…

 **Momoi:** Kyaaah! Tetsu-kun's eating a peach-flavored Popsicle. Tetsu-kun, you know you can eat me anytime!

 **Everyone:** - _sweat drops_ -

* * *

- _Momoi, having just come out from the bath_ -

 **Everyone:** - _whistles_ -

 **Momoi** : T-that's for Tetsu-kun's eyes only!'

* * *

- _Mitobe household_ -

 **Akashi:** … It must be nice to have so many siblings.

 **Mitobe:** …

 **Koganei:** He said, "But it could also be pretty rowdy."

 **Akashi:** Still, you could form a whole basketball team.

 **Mitobe:** …

 **Koganei:** He said, "Thanks, I'll consider it."

* * *

- _Aida heading to the baths_ -

 **Aomine** **:** -yawns- I'm glad they skipped it. Nothing to see there.

 **Aida:** - _chuckles darkly_ -

* * *

- _Tsuchida, bitten by a_ _kitten_ -

 **Mayuzumi:** …That always happen in anime.

* * *

- _Before the match, Seirin lockers_ -

 **Akashi:** … Aida-san, was it really necessary to hit Koganei-san like that?

 **Momoi:** What a brute flat-chested woman.

 **Aida:** ...

* * *

- _Game starts_ -

 **Akashi:** Momoi, who's that fifth member of your team?

 **Momoi:** … Ahaha, you know, it's _that_ , one of those unnamed extras who only appear once.

* * *

- _Ending Song Special frame_ -

 **Koganei:** He llllllikes her~

 **Hyuuga:** - _blushes_ \- Shut up, idiot.

* * *

- _Last Picture_ -

 **Momoi:** - _stares at Kagami with suspicion_ -

 **Kagami:** What are you staring at?

 **Momoi:** What's Tetsu-kun to you?

 **Kagami:** Huh?


	18. Episode 16

**Episode 16:**

 **Let's Go**

* * *

- _Opening Song_ -

 **Akashi:** Nothing changed, right? We could just skip it next time.

 **Susa:** … ' _I'm still hoping that they will add me, though_.'

* * *

- _1_ _st_ _Quarter_ -

 **Sakurai:** I'm sorry for making that shot!

 **Hyuuga:** - _sweat drops_ -

…

 **Kasamatsu:** Individual play. Their play reminds me of...

 **Akashi:** Hm? Anything wrong, Kasamatsu-san?

 **Kasamatsu:** Never mind.

…

 **Murasakibara:** Kuro-chin, you shouldn't try to imitate Kagami. He's a bad influence.

* * *

- _Kise meets Midorima_ -

 **Midorima:** I thought that the lucky item he was holding was familiar. To think that it was actually me...

 **Takao:** Eh? Seriously?!

 **Midorima:** …

…

 **Aomine:** You only knew about Satsuki's obsession just then? I can't believe it. I had to deal with it every day of middle school!

 **Akashi:** I even helped with the matchmaking.

 **Momoi:** Y-you mean, that time... - _blushes_ -

 **Midorima:** …

* * *

- _Back to the game_ -

 **Momoi:** _Ex-girlfriend_? So rude. I am Tetsu-kun's _current_ girlfriend... ' _even if he doesn't know it'_. Hmph!

…

 **Mayuzumi:** Height, weight, strengths, weaknesses, personality, habits, coupled with a woman intuition...

 **Aomine:** … Aa. A stalker.

 **Mayuzumi:** I was supposed to say a fan girl, but that also works.

…

 **Mayuzumi:** Seems that the only person she can't stalk is the one she really wants to. The sad irony.

* * *

- _Second quarter_ -

 **Miyaji:** I get that she doesn't have a lot of data regarding Kagami. But Kuroko used to be her teammate, right? She should have tons of stal- I mean data, about him.

 **Momoi:** Don't mistake me, I also got a lot of data on Tetsu-kun. Like, what kind of sports drinks he likes, what kind of snacks he buys, what games he plays, where he lives...

 **Miyaji:** - _sweat drops_ -

…

 **Kobori:** Isn't it better to send out one of the first years instead of the injured player?

 **Furihata, Fukuda, and Kawahara:**!

 **Moriyama:** True. Not only that Momoi-san doesn't know about them, it's also their chance to get some experience. They do the same training, and they did stood up against Akashi in last Winter Cup, so I think they should be pretty decent players.

 **Kobori:** I was more concerned about Kagami's injury...

 **Hayama:** No, they should have sent out Tsuchida-senpai! He needs more appearance!

 **Hayakawa:** The(y) nee(d) mor(e) rebound(s)!

 **Furihata, Fukuda,** **Tsuchida,** **and Kawahara:** ...

* * *

- _Aomine arrives_ -

 **Kagami:** - _shivers_ \- What were you thinking, suddenly appearing out of nowhere, and acting like we were buddies?

 **Kuroko:** Please stop harassing my light, Aomine-kun.

 **Aomine:** Aww, c'mon, Tetsu. It was just for fun.

* * *

- _Ending Song special frame_ -

 **Takao:** Wait, those words in the background, aren't they familiar?

 **Himuro:** … Taiga, don't tell me it was your doing? I thought you already went past that stage?

 **Kagami:** No! I didn't do it!

 **Himuro:** But only you would write "This is Japanese Lunch Time Rush."

 **Akashi:** Vandalizing in public places? I'm also disappointed in you, Kuroko. Instead of stopping him, you joined him instead. Don't make excuses. That "I'm Shadow" at the bottom is clearly yours.

 **Kuroko:** … I'm sorry.

* * *

- _Last Picture_ -

 **Kise:** Whoa, Aominecchi and Momoicchi really look good together. Sometimes, I wonder if there's something between them.

 **Aomine:** - _yawns_ -There's none.

 **Momoi:** My heart belongs to Tetsu-kun.

 **Kise:** But... but... - _whispers to Aomine_ \- Isn't she your type? Pretty face, big boobs, and all.

 **Aomine:** Huh? No way. Satsuki is Satsuki. She's like, that someone that's always following and nagging behind you.

 **Kise:** But you're also close to her family. Her grandmother even made you that yukata one festival...

 **Aomine:** That's because we live near each other, duh.

 **Kise:** - _stares at the picture with regret_ -

* * *

 **PBJane:** There are some references to the REPLACE novels, like Akashi's 'matchmaking', and that summer festival in case you're wondering. But you don't have to read them, since they won't be affecting anything.


	19. Episode 17

**Episode 17**

 **You're All Ridiculous**

* * *

- _Flashback_ -

 **Akashi:** That flashback was ridiculously long.

* * *

- _Touou Member change_ -

 **Hayama:** Ne, Aomine, who was that player you guys subbed out? I never got to see him play. He never even touched the ball!

 **Aomine:** Umm... Imayoshi-san, who was that again?

 **Imayoshi:** - _sweat drops_ \- He's that unnamed extra Momoi explained a while ago.

 **Hayama:** He doesn't have a special skill or something?

 **Imayoshi:** … No.

 **Hayama:** Aww. Too bad.

...

 **Akashi:** See? Aomine is more of a bad-guy material than I am. And isn't it a common plot in anime, that the main character's best friend joins the other side and becomes one of the protagonist's worst enemy? Aomine fits the role perfectly.

 **Mayuzumi:** Akashi, do you even watch anime?

 **Akashi:** … I am absolute.

 **Everyone:** … ' _So that's where he got his chuunibyou lines!_ '

* * *

- _Half-time break-_

 **Imayoshi:** … Somehow, it's tragic that more men are becoming better cooks than women.

 **Mayuzumi:** What's more tragic is that the only girls in this series so far can't cook for the life of them.

 **Akashi:** I agree. There goes every man's apron fantasy.

 **Imayoshi:** …

 **Mayuzumi:** …

 **Akashi:** … It was a joke.

 **Mayuzumi:** … I'll pretend I didn't hear that.

...

 **Murasakibara:** Those honey lemons looks tasty, Muro-chin. I want one too.

 **Himuro:** Okay. I'll make some for the next match. But just as Wakamatsu-san pointed out, you have to play first if you want any.

 **Murasakibara:** Oookaaay.

 **Akashi:** … Mibuchi-san, can you prepare honey-soaked lemons for next match?

 **Mibuchi:** Sure. Though, why are you only asking now?

 **Akashi:** Touou has Sakurai, and Seirin has Mitobe. We also need someone who can make them in our team. And it's a given that ours should be far better than theirs.

 **Mibuchi:** ...

 **Midorima:** … Takao.

 **Takao:** Right, right, you also want some, correct? Really, our Ace-sama is very demanding.

 **Midorima:** O-of course not! But if you're going to make it, I might as well have some, since you're going to take the trouble making them. I-I just don't want them to go to waste.

 **Takao:** Pfffft!

 **Hayakawa:** Kise, do yo(u) a(l)so wan(t) so(m)e?!

 **Kise:** Ah, no thanks. My fan girls already makes enough.

 **GoM except Kise:** … ' _lucky bastard!_ '

 **Kasamatsu:** I wonder why they really want those honey lemons...

 **GoM:** … ' _It's because w_ _e had to suffer through Momoi_ _'s!_ '

…

 **Hayama:** Ne, don't you think the game feels really special whenever they put Tsuchida-senpai in?

 **Everyone:** …

* * *

- _Just before 3_ _rd_ _quarter_ -

 **Kuroko:** - _flat_ \- Aomine-kun, looking at you is making me feel hot.

 **Momoi:** T-Tetsu-kun?

 **Kuroko:** In a literal sense. How hot do you think he is if he can produce steam around him?

* * *

- _3_ _rd_ _quarter_ -

 **Aomine:** This brings back memories. I really am the strongest.

 **Akashi:**...Daiki.

 **Aomine:**!

…

 **Furihata:** Ah. It's ankle break, Aomine version.

 **Akashi:** ...

…

 **Kuroko:** Not only is his basketball messed-up, but the person himself is more messed-up,

 **Aomine:** Oi! What do you mean by that, Tetsu?

…

 **Kuroko:** I'm glad I'm not part of the GoM. That means I'm not ridiculous.

 **Akashi:** What are you saying, Kuroko? You're an honorary member.

 **Kuroko:** As much as it flatters me, I must refuse.

 **Akashi:** I insist.

 **Kuroko:** No, thank you. I'm proud to be normal.

* * *

- _Ending Song_ -

 **Kagami:** Tatsuya, I've just realized it... doesn't that vandal look familiar to you?

 **Himuro** : Hm?

 **Kagami:** After having watched it for 4 times, I just suddenly remembered. That looks like the one we did a few years back.

 **Himuro:** Now that you mentioned it...

 **Murasakibara:** Your name is even there, Muro-chin. Ah, Kagami's name is there too.

 **Himuro:** Yeah, I could see that, Atsushi.

 **Akashi:** Who is "Alex"?

 **Kuroko:** That would be Kagami-kun's girlfriend.

 **Kagami:** She's not! She's a mentor of sorts to Tatsuya and me.

 **Kuroko:** She's currently living with Kagami-kun. She also sleeps naked in Kagami-kun's bedroom.

 **Everyone:**!

 **Kagami:** Kuroko!

 **Akashi:** I see... Kagami, invite her here also.

 **Kagami:** What are you planning?!

 **Akashi:** Nothing. It might be interesting to hear her comments about your performance.

 **Kagami:** …

* * *

- _Ending Song special frame_ -

 **Akashi:** Takao, don't you get tired of his Prima Donna attitude? I can't remember him acting that ridiculous back in middle school. You've spoiled him.

 **Midorima:** … Did you just have to say "ridiculous"?

 **Akashi:** Of course. Because you're all ridiculous.

 **Everyone:** … ' _Did he just want to say the title?_ '

* * *

 _-Last Picture-_

 **Susa:** And again, I'm not there...

 **Aomine:** Don't be ridiculous. I'm also not there, see?

 **Wakamatsu:** Idiot, you got plenty of screen time already!

 **Kimura:** … I was also forgotten that one time,

 **Kobori:** Don't mind it. There's always that member in a team who gives way so that the others can shine more.

 **Everyone:** … ' _They are the real shadows!_ '

* * *

 **PBJane:** … I'm sorry (not much), but Oreshi is just too fun to mess up with. If you haven't seen KnB's version of Uta no Prince-sama's Maji Love 1000% in youtube, then I highly recommend you check it out now! It's sung by their voice actors (Akashi kept on trolling Midorima, probably because of their seiyuu's history xD)

Also, in the REPLACE novels/manga, Kise initially thought that Momoi and Aomine had a thing. Then he learned that Momoi's into Kuroko. Anyway, he just finds it cute to tease her.

Oh, and if I mysteriously go missing, Akashi probably stabbed me with his red scissors. Anyways, thanks for all the reviews! Bye bee!


	20. Episode 18

**Episode 18:**

 **No!**

* * *

- _Aomine and Momoi's flashback_ -

 **Imayoshi:** - _whistles_ \- Aomine was actually such a cute brat. How did he grow to become this monster?

 **Susa:** … ' _You were partly at fault there_.'

* * *

 _-Back to the match, 3rd quarter-_

 **Wakamatsu:** Dammit. I know that Ahomine is the strongest, but still, that arrogance of his pisses me off to no end.

 **Miyaji:** Ahaha! Kimura can lend you a pineapple if you want. You can contact him anytime. Here's his number...

 **Wakamatsu:** Thanks. I think I'll need it real soon.

 **Akashi:** - _whispers to Mibuchi-_ … I wasn't that overbearing, was I?

 **Mibuchi:** - _sweat drops_ \- Ah no, of course not, Sei-chan.

 **Akashi:** - _continues to whisper_ \- That's a relief.

 **Mibuchi:** Aa... ' _You were just friggin scary!_ '

…

 **Miyaji:** … I give up trying to understand the GoM and their physics defying sh*t.

 **Ootsubo:** That's good. It isn't healthy for the brain.

 **Akashi:** …

* * *

- _Aomine taunts Kuroko to play_ -

 **Kise:** Jeez, Aominecchi, how much of a bad-guy were you trying to play there? It isn't like you to antagonize him to that extent.

 **Aomine:** That's none of your business, Kise.

 **Akashi:** Yes, he was that much bitter.

 **Midorima:** … You're talking too much, Akashi.

 **Akashi:** Hn? I'm only making up for my lack of screen time.

 **Midorima:** … No, you're clearly enjoying this.

* * *

- _G_ _ame resumes_ -

 **Murasakibara:** Kuro-chin, how do you make that whirlwind effect? It looks cool.

 **Kuroko:** I believe you already know how. You also have your version whenever you use your Thor Hammer.

 **Murasakibara:** Oh, Really? I didn't notice that.

…

 **Akashi:** - _frowns_ \- True. I noticed that this show is called "Kuroko no Basuke."

 **Akashi:** … ' _I want my own show._ _I shall call it:_ _Akashi's Absolute Basketball._ '

 **Everyone:** … " _Why can I guess what he's thinking?_ "

…

 **Kuroko:** Akashi-kun, about what Aomine-kun said... you really said something like that?

 **Akashi:** … - _sweat drop_ -

 **Kuroko:** … I really hate that side of you, Akashi-kun.

 **Akashi:**!

…

 **Kuroko:** Aomine-kun... that pass and the other one was for Kagami-kun.

 **Aomine:** Huh? What's wrong with stealing them?

 **Kuroko:** … You're no longer my light. Please stop stealing my passes for Kagami-kun.

 **Aomine:** It's a game, why shouldn't I?

 **Kuroko:** … It just irritates me.

 **Akashi:** Aomine, you're a thing from Kuroko's past. Move on.

 **Kuroko:** Even if you say that, I'm still annoyed at you, Akashi-kun.

 **Akashi:** !

 **Aomine:** …

* * *

- _Kagami gets subbed out_ -

 **Fukui:** Oh, they're dead.

 **Seirin:** …

* * *

- _Game resumes_ -

 **Fukui:** Aomine's had the ball for a long time, and was having a leisurely chat with Kuroko, who's guarding him. But why was Kuroko the one guarding him in the first place beats me. Anyway, where's the five-second violation or something?

 **Everyone:** …

…

 **Akashi:** Kuroko... I hope you were not hoping for another meteor that time.

 **Kuroko:** … I'm sorry. And please don't talk to me right now, Akashi-kun.

 **Everyone:** … ' _He_ _actually_ _was?!_ '

 **Akashi:** ...

…

 **Midorima:** … I think they already gave up. They even let _Kuroko_ go one-on-one against Aomine.

 **Kuroko:** …

* * *

- _Fast forward scene, Seirin losing_ -

 **Midorima:** Hmph. Recycled scenes.

 **Takao:** You can't blame them, Shin-chan. Production costs are pretty expensive.

…

 **Murasakibara:** Araraa~ They should have just forfeited the game and take a nap. Or eat snacks. It's more productive that way.

 **Himuro:** You can't do that, Atsushi.

…

 **Takao:** You see, Shin-chan? They didn't cry, even if they terribly lost.

 **Midorima:** I wasn't crying!


	21. Episode 19

**Episode 19:**

 **On to a New Challenge**

* * *

- _Touou wins by doubling Seirin's score_ -

 **Murasakibara:** … Kuro-chin, do you want a Maibou?

 **Kuroko:** No, thank you, Murasakibara-kun.

 **Wen Liu:** Hast thou forgotten, Murasakibara-dono?

 **Murasakibara:** Hm?

 **Okamura:** Even if we see them lose badly now, remember that they defeated us during Winter Cup.

 **Murasakibara:** … On second thought, I'm not giving you any maibou, Kuro-chin. Go buy your own.

 **Kuroko:** …

…

 **Mibuchi:** Arara~ Satsuki-chan, your team just broke Tetsu-chan's heart~

 **Momoi:** I'm sorry, Tetsu-kun! Please don't hate me!

* * *

- _Midorima and Kise talks_ -

 **Takao:** - _disbelief_ \- Shin-chan, you're openly admitting that you're worried for Kuroko-kun?

 **Kise:** Unbelievable, right? I couldn't believe myself the first time I heard it. I thought I heard him wrong.

 **Midorima:** Idiot! I'm not worried! Shuutoku would just look like a laughing stock if we lost to such a weak team!

 **Takao:** Really, when can you be honest, Shin-chan?

 **Midorima:** Shut up, Takao.

* * *

- _Touou lockers_ -

 **Kise:** So Aominecchi actually cares about Kurokocchi, right?

 **Aomine:** … Shut-up, Kise.

* * *

- _Seirin lockers_ -

 **Mibuchi:** See? Your team even made Taiga-chan and Tetsu-chan fight.

 **Momoi:** I'm sorry, Tetsu-kun!

 **Aomine:** Stop apologizing, Satsuki. They already had their revenge, you know.

 **Mibuchi:** -chuckles- Satsuki-chan is so cute~

 **Momoi:** Eeh?

 **Kise:** Right? Should I tell you about what happened one time during middle school when Akashicchi ordered Momo-

 **Kasamatsu:** Shut-up, Kise!

* * *

- _Seirin experiences defeat one after another_ -

 **Midorima:** … You've become silent, Akashi.

 **Akashi:** Hm? Is there anything wrong with it? I'm just trying to sympathize with Kuroko's team.

 **Midorima:** … ' _Is he actually the type to get affected with dramas?_ '

 **Akashi:** … ' _As if. Actually, Kuroko's still mad at me._ '

* * *

- _Seirin practice resumes_ -

 **Rakuzan Team:** … ' _You're lucky to be let off with only 3x training!_ '

…

 **Momoi:** That's right! I shouldn't be apologizing! Dai-chan, we must beat Tetsu-kun this year! We must make Tetsu-kun confess his love for me!

 **Aomine:** - _sweat drop_ -

* * *

- _Teppei appears in the gym_ -

 **Murasakibara:** Hmph!

 **Nebuya:** Keh.

 **Kiyoshi:** Ahaha! What did I do?

 **Everyone:** ' _They are just in disbelief that they lost to such a weird player..._ '

 **Murasakibara:** … Unlike Kuro-chin, you didn't offer me some candy.

 **Everyone:** ' _That's his problem?!_ '

* * *

- _Kagami enters practice_ -

 **Wakamatsu:** Kaah! At least Kagami knows how to apologize. Our idiot ace doesn't!

* * *

- _Kiyoshi enters practice_ -

 **Akashi:** …

 **Midorima:** If he's been in the hospital since the summer ago, won't he be repeating a grade then?

 **Kiyoshi:** Ahaha!

 **Mibuchi:** Hmm... maybe I should do that. Then next year... - _grins_ -

 **Akashi:** But before that, you'll be in trouble. The teachers won't allow you to join club activities if your grades significantly drop.

 **Mibuchi:** Awww~

…

 **Midorima:** … I can't believe it. We got beaten, and drew a tie, with a team created by an idiot.

 **Kiyoshi:** Ahaha! But cards are really fun!

 **Midorima:** …

* * *

- _Ending Song special frame_ -

 **Midorima:** … Takao, why didn't you tell me you had an outing with them? Not that I'm interested or anything...

 **Takao:** Eh? But you're also there, see? You're even wearing sunglasses.

 **Midorima:** Eh! That's me?

 **Kise:** - _snickers_ \- You're still saying that?

* * *

 _OMAKE_

 **Akashi:** Kuroko, I'll ask our butler Tanaka-san to make you some vanilla milkshake as a peace offering.

 **Kuroko:** What are you saying, Akashi-kun? I've never been really mad at you. But it would be a waste not to try the milkshake, so I'll accept your peace offering.

 **Akashi:** …


	22. Episode 20

**Episode 20:**

 **I Don't Want To Be**

* * *

 **Akashi:** At last they took out that horrible pre-opening sequence.

 **Everyone:** …

* * *

- _Shuutoku Gym_ -

 **Momoi:** - _chuckles_ \- Midorimacchi is still bad at hiding it.

 **Midorima:** Hmph! A-anyway, Takao, how did you know where I live? Are you stalking me or something?

 **Takao:** Pfffft! Shin-chan, how many times do you think have I pedaled the rickshaw for you?

* * *

- _After Kagami beat Kiyoshi on one-on-one_ -

 **Nebuya:** … I can't believe it.

 **Midorima:** … he's incredible, in a way.

 **Kiyoshi:** Ahaha! Is that a compliment? Thanks!

 **Everyone:** ' _That was sarcasm!_ '

* * *

- _Seirin vs Tokushin Practice Game_ -

 **Hayama:** Woah! They're sending all their first years! Yosha! It's the debut of their first years! I wonder if they also have special skills...

…

 **Akashi:** … Koganei-san, you have quite an imagination.

 **Koganei:** Eeep! T-thanks?

 **Akashi:** - _smiles_ \- No need to be afraid. Let's be friends.

 **Koganei:** A-ah. EEEEEH?!

 **Everyone:** … ' _What is he plotting this time?!_ '

 **Akashi:** - _smirks_ \- ' _My Akashi no Zettai Basuke is with_ _in_ _my grasp._ '

…

 **Kise:** Kurokocchi...

 **Momoi:** Tetsu-kun...

 **Aomine:** Not my fault...

…

 **Hayama:** Tsk, the first year trio didn't get to show off their skills. But I have a feeling that they will be the ones who will become Rakuzan Trio's nemesis.

 **Kawahara, Furihata, and Fukuda:** ...

 **Everyone:** ... ' _Why do you say that? Is it because they are also lumped together? Like the three uncrowned kings of Rakuzan?_ '

* * *

- _Kuroko asks to be_ _removed_ _from the starting line up_ -

 **Kise:** T-they even made Kurokocchi feel that way?! Kurokocchi, you should have transferred to Kaijo! I would have never tossed you aside like what Kagami did! I'll treasure you!

 **Kagami:** Oi!

 **Kise:** I'm not going to call you 'Kagamicchi' anymore.

 **Kagami:** … I'm actually grateful for that.

 **Kise:** I demand you to give us Kurokocchi!

 **Kasamatsu:** … Shut up already, Kise!

 **Akashi:** … Yeah, give us Kuroko.

 **Everyone:** …

 **Everyone:** … EEEH?!

 **Midorima:** … W-what are you saying, Akashi?

 **Akashi:** Mayuzumi-san already graduated. We need a new passing specialist in Rakuzan.

 **Mibuchi:** …

 **Kuroko:** …

 **Akashi:** Your accommodations will be free. You will also be supplied with an XL size vanilla milkshake per day.

 **Kuroko:** I'll go.

 **Kagami:** Oi, Kuroko! You aren't serious, are you?

 **Kuroko:** I am always serious, Kagami-kun.

 **Kagami:** H-hey, if you want vanilla milkshakes that badly, I can make you some, anytime you like.

 **Kuroko:** … On the other hand, Kyoto's too far. So no thank you, Akashi-kun. I appreciate the offer though.

 **Akashi:** Is that so? Too bad.

 **Kagami:** _phew_.

 **Midorima:** …

 **Kise:** ...

* * *

- _Hyuuga reveals what Kagami told him_ -

 **Takao:** Pffft! At least he's not as awkward as our Ace-sama. Shin-chan's 10x worse! Hahahahaha!

* * *

- _Kagami and Kuroko plays 1-on-1 in an outside court_ -

 **Aomine:** You're still as demanding as ever, Tetsu.

…

 **Kagami** **:** … And here you almost accepted Akashi's offer to transfer to Rakuzan.

 **Kuroko:** I just wanted to scare you a bit.

 **Kagami:** … No, you were completely serious.

 **Kuroko:** … che.

…

 **Akashi:** A "new Kuroko no Basuke"?

 **Kuroko:** Is there anything wrong, Akashi-kun?

 **Akashi:** … I won't allow that.

 **Kuroko:** … You're unusually fired-up, Akashi-kun.

 **Akashi:** No, you're just imagining things... ' _The only new show that would be made will be my Akashi no Zettai Basuke._ '

* * *

- _Ending Song special frame_ -

 **Midorima:** … Why was Kise trying to take my slip?

 **Takao:** Ah? You really don't know? He wants to team-up with Kuroko-kun.

 **Midorima:** … I see. I'm sorry, Kise, but it was a slip that fate gave me. I cannot just give it away.

 **Kise:** … - _smirk_ -

 **Takao:** And really, Shin-chan, did you have to put your shades on the penguin?

 **Midorima:** Because it was my lucky item! I've got to disguise it. Someone might try to steal it. And Kise, what's with that smug look?

 **Kise:** _Nothing_ ~

* * *

- _Last Picture-_

 **Momoi:** Hmmm~ Hyuuga-san and Kiyoshi-san looks pretty close. They get along well, don't they?

 **Hyuuga:** Hell no!

 **Kiyoshi:** Ahaha! What are you saying, Hyuuga? Of course we do!


	23. Episode 21

**Episode 21:**

 **Let's Get Started**

* * *

- _Hyuuga and Aida deciding where to spend the 'summer vacation'_ -

 **Moriyama:** - _whispers_ \- Kuroko-kun, is there something between your coach and your captain?

 **Kuroko:** - _whispers back_ \- Yes, but it's pretty much one-sided so far.

 **Akashi** : - _whispers_ \- I bet it's Hyuuga-san, right?

 **Moriyama:** !

 **Kuroko:** Akashi-kun, please don't scare us like that.

 **Akashi:** … I was just curious. - _turns away_ -

 **Mi** **buchi** **:** …

* * *

- _Kagami teaches Aida how to cook curry_ -

 **Aomine:** … Kagami. I have a favor to ask you.

 **Kagami:** Huh?! And why should I listen to you?

 **Aomine:** You're the only one I can turn to. I'll lend you my time if you'll agree. We can have as many 1-on-1 matches as you want.

 **Kagami** : Y-you're acting way too suspicious. O-oi! What are you doing? Stand up, idiot! it's embarrassing!

 **Aomine:** I won't, not until you listen to my request.

 **Kagami:** F-fine. What is it?

 **Aomine:** Please teach Satsuki how to cook!

 **Momoi:** Hm?

 **Kagami:** …

 **Other GoM and Kuroko:** … ' _We saw that coming..._ '

* * *

- _Aida's father appears, and warns them_ -

 **Akashi:** … His voice is the same as the narrator of that horrible pre-opening sequence.

 **Aida:** !

* * *

- _Seirin starts beach basketball_ -

 **Akashi:** Mibuchi, let's do a notch higher than their's. Let's have the court on the sea.

 **Rakuzan Team:** …

 **Mayuzumi:** … I'm glad I'm out of there.

* * *

-Guest house lavatory-

 **Momoi:** Kyaaaaah! Tetsu-kun's bed-head is so cute~!

 **Imayoshi** : …

 **Aomine:** … Don't ask. Satsuki's tastes have always been weird.

* * *

- _Midorima and Takao enters and meets Kagami and Kuroko_ -

 **Aomine:** - _snickers_ -

 **Akashi:** It's fate.

 **Aomine:** Hnn... I know that the atmosphere there could get a little... exciting, especially since it's a guest-house. I hope you kids remembered to practice safe s*x.

 **Kagami:** Ahomine, you bastard... you know it's not like that!

 **Midorima:** And there's no chance it's like that, idiot! First of all, I'm straight! Also, get it into your thick head that our signs are not compatible! We're also both minors, and-

 **Aomine:** Alright, alright, don't get your panties bunched up.

 **Midorima:** AOMINE!

 **Kuroko** : … It was pretty exciting, but I was also a little nervous because it was my first time ( _having a joint training camp_ ). I really look up to them, so I hope I didn't disappoint them. Also, of course I know safe s*x, Aomine-kun. It was taught in S*x Education.

 **Momoi:** Takao-kun... let's have another talk, shall we?

 **Takao:** Oi, Kuroko! I swear, you're doing it on purpose!

 **Kise:** Mou, I also want to hold a joint training-camp with Kurokocchi's team. So unfair.

* * *

- _Aida appears with a bloody knife_ -

 **Akashi:** …

 **Akashi:**... See? Hers is a bloody knife. How come everyone's more afraid of the small pair of scissors?

 **Everyone:** ...

* * *

- _Seirin vs Shuutoku practice game_ -

 **Kise:** Midorimacchi, why are you so hard on Kurokocchi?

 **Midorima:** I was only stating the facts.

 **Mibuchi:** Is that why you always play Shogi by yourself, Sei-chan? So that you can improve by yourself?

 **Akashi:** … That's right.

 **Kise:** … ' _I thought Akashicchi was just lonely, and just couldn't find a playmate..._ '

 **Akashi:** …

* * *

- _Takao and Midorima in the baths_ -

 **Momoi:** Midorin's eyelashes are really long, it makes me jealous.

 **Takao:** Right? At first, I was wondering why he wasn't popular with girls. It all boils down to his weirdness. I think that if Shin-chan won't speak, he'll have many admirers flocking him in no time. - _snickers_ -

 **Midorima:** Shut-up, Takao.

* * *

- _Kagami enters the baths, but it was already closed_ -

 **Kuroko:** So that was the reason why you stunk so much. Furihata-kun and Izuki-senpai couldn't sleep because of the smell.

 **Kagami:** I bought you your drinks, you know?!

 **Kuroko:** This and that are different things.

* * *

- _Ending Song Special Frame_ -

 **Midorima:** K-Kise, how did you end up in the green team? I thought I got the green slip, and you got the red one?

 **Takao:** … You really can't remember, Shin-chan?

 **Midorima:** … !

 **Takao:** - _snickers_ \- It seems that he's remembering.

 **Kise:** - _s_ _mirks-_ In the end, I got Izuki and _Kurokocchi_ in my team.

 **A** **omine:** Aa. That's why you're wearing that stupid grin.

 **Kise:** Hey, for a day, I got to be Kurokocchi's Light! Of course I was fired up!


	24. Episode 22

**Episode 22:**

 **I'll Win Even If It Kills Me**

* * *

\- _Aida's 'Icing' technique_ -

 **Kobori:** Umm, those first year trio... why are they always excluded?

 **Aida:** … Ahaha! They also participated, of course! - _aside_ \- _It's just not shown_.

 **Furihata, Fukuda, Kawahara:** … ' _Sometimes, I wonder if we're just extras_ '

 **Kawahara:** ' _Shut up, Furi! You had your time to shine during Winter Cup! Me and Fukuda are clearly the extra ones to fill up the required number for the first year team!_ '

 **Fukuda:** ' _Now, now, Kawahara. I'm just glad to be of help. That's the main reason I joined after all._ '

 **Furihata:** … ' _Now I'm really starting to pity ourselves. We are even starting to develop some sort of telepathy because we're always lumped together, 3 in 1, on the bench or elsewhere._ _We even finish each other's thoughts in the show. This is really tragic._ '

 **Hayama:** See? They are starting to become a formidable trio. If they could communicate without words on court, we'd be in deep trouble...

 **Everyone:** ...

* * *

- _Takao humming the 2_ _nd_ _ED song_ -

 **Akashi:** Takao, how did you know about the ending song of this show?

 **Midorima:** Apparently, he's a fan of that band. Also, you have to hear his self-concerts next time.

 **Takao:** !

 **Midorima:** - _smirks_ -

* * *

- _Takao almost got crushed by the basketball goal_ -

 **Takao:** Man, that was dangerous.

 **Midorima:** … tsk.

* * *

- _Midorima arrives and sees Kagami, Kuroko was forced to hide with Takao_ -

 **Aomine:** Ah, it's a secret rendezvous.

 **Midorima and Kagami:** It's not!

…

 **Akashi:** … If Aomine's homework and exam sheets are amusing, for Midorima's case, it's his speech.

 **Takao:** I know right? Pffft!

 **Aomine:** Oi!

 **Midorima:** …

* * *

- _GoM scene_ -

 **Akashi:** … Center and forward. My first real appearance is perfect.

 **Everyone:** …

* * *

- _Midorima_ _beats Kagami in 1-on-1_ _and 'gives advice'_ -

 **Ootsubo:** What were you doing, helping the enemy?

 **Midorima:** …I was just stating facts.

 **Akashi:** You're a good guy, Midorima.

 **Midorima:** … Shut-up.

* * *

- _Kagami and Kuroko jogging on the beach_ -

 **Miyaji:** To 'become able to move at will in air'... Don't you do plenty of that already?

…

 **Kimura:** … And Science doesn't seem to apply to the GoM too.

* * *

- _Aida cooking_ -

 **Hyuuga:** Who left her in the kitchen?!

 **Koganei:** Only you and Kiyoshi weren't doing anything back then. You should have watched her yourselves.

 **Kiyoshi:** Well, no one died, so it's okay. Ahaha!

* * *

- _Midorima and Kuroko talks_ -

 **Akashi:** " _Even a flea can jump..._ " Shizu-chan, you're in the wrong program.

 **Midorima:** Huh?

 **Akashi:** … Nothing.

* * *

- _Inter-High Semi-Finals: Kaijo Locker_ -

 **Aomine:** Kise, that Hayakawa fellow is as noisy as our Wakamatsu.

 **Kise:** Didn't you listen earlier? It's a requirement for rebounders.

 **Wakamatsu:** …

…

 **Akashi:** Ryouta... were those honey-dipped lemons?

 **Kise:** !

 **Mibuchi:** … ' _I better make some tonight._ '

…

 **Murasakibara:** Kise-chin, your coach looks like a dumpling. Can I eat him?

 **Akashi:** Murasakibara, don't. You'll get a very nasty stomach ache, and you won't be allowed to eat snacks anymore.

* * *

- _Touou Lockers: Aomine arrives_ -

 **Kagami:** Aomine, you bastard! You showed up late when you were against us, but you showed up on time when it was against Kise?

 **Kuroko:** Aomine-kun, I'm hurt.

 **Aomine:** O-oi, that was a long time ago! Forget about it already. Besides, you guys were too weak back then!

 **Kuroko:** … Aomine-kun, I think you need a reminder of my Ignite Pass Kai.

 **Aomine:** !

…

 **Akashi:** Aomine, do you have a grudge against Kise? You said you were going to crush him with such a scary look. As the former captain of you both, I feel responsible. I don't remember raising you to be a violent person. Perhaps we can settle the issue between you two in a more peaceful manner?

 **Aomine:** N-no, there's nothing going on between us. Right, Kise?

 **Kise:** Y-yeah, it's already been settled. No need for Akashicchi to intervene.

* * *

- _Kise and Kasamatsu talks_ -

 **Akashi:** Kise, your suicidal tendencies is also quite worrisome...

 **Kise:** A-ah, no, I no longer have those tendencies, I swear!

* * *

- _Ending Song Special Frame_ -

 **Midorima:** …

 **Murasakibara:** Ah. Are glasses the uniform in your team, Mido-chin?

 **Takao:** Pffft! Hahaahahaha!

 **Aomine:** - _snickers_ \- Nice impression, Tetsu.

 **Akashi:** … - _lips tilt upwards_ -

 **Midorima:** That was all your fault, Kise! That green slip was what Fortune bestowed me! But because you took it away, I got stuck with Hyuuga-san and Imayoshi-san!

 **Takao:** Hahahahaha! I remember Shin-chan got very prissy when we were heading back. Because he was with Hyuuga-san and and Imayoshi-san, he couldn't even have his usual selfishness!

 **Kise:** - _snickers_ -

 **Midorima:** … KISE!

* * *

- _Last Picture_ -

 **Aomine:** Ah, is that the picture from your double date?

 **Midorima:** … I'm too tired to argue about it anymore.

 **Kagami:** … Yeah, let's just ignore them. Maybe they'll get bored of it.

 **Momoi:** … Takao-kun, why were you so close to my Tetsu-kun?

 **Takao:** Eeeep!

* * *

 **PBJane:** When Akashi called Midorima 'Shizu-chan', it was a Durarara Reference. Midorima's voice actor also voices Heiwajima Shizuo, and Akashi's voice actor also voices Orihara Izaya. I couldn't resist the temptation when Midorima said 'flea'. I actually checked the manga, and it wasn't there. So I think it could be intentional xD


	25. Episode 23

**Episode 23:**

 **Not An Adult!**

* * *

- _Teikou Days: Kise's flashback-_

 **Kuroko:** … Kise-kun, how about I'll ignite a pass on your guts?

 **Kise:** So mean, Kurokocchi! I didn't really mean it! I was only bored back then!

 **Akashi:** Clearly, Aomine has been a bad influence on you, Kuroko.

…

 **Kise:** Aominecchi, how did you know that I was a model back then? I thought you don't care about those stuff, and the only magazines you have are those scandalous ones.

 **Aomine:** It was Satsuki. She told me that Murasakibara has a model classmate and showed me a picture.

 **Momoi:** Ah, that one! I think I borrowed it from Micchan. I was pretty curious that we had a model in the batch. But it turned out that Tetsu-kun was better-looking.

 **Kise:** - _sweat drops_ -

 **Everyone:** … ' _I really question her tastes._ '

…

 **Imayoshi:** So, back then our Aomine could inspire people to play basketball?

 **Wakamatsu:** But now, people would be too scared to do so once they see his violent play.

 **Imayoshi:** -sigh- Whatever happened to our Aomine.

 **Susa:** I think it's part of being a teenager.

 **Everyone:** ' _You're also still teenagers!_ '

* * *

- _Game Starts_ -

 **Akashi:** Kasamatsu-san, when did you find time to stomp on Kise in the middle of an ongoing game?

 **Wen Liu** **:** And my mind is forever addled whither you found time to take part in lengthy speeches amidst a game.

 **Everyone:** …

...

 **Midorima:** You're wrong, Kise. I think Momoi knows the most about Aomine.

 **Kise:** Oh, right. I forgot about that. My bad.

* * *

- _Teikou Days Flashback_ -

 **Kuroko:** You said it hurts, but you're having fun. I'm afraid that feeling is called Masochism, Kise-kun.

 **Kise:** Not in _that_ way! Kurokocchi's so mean!

 **Kuroko:** Don't worry, Kise-kun. I understand. I also understand why Aomine-kun couldn't practice much with me anymore. We also used to practice until late. But I guess he preferred his sessions with Kise-kun because it satisfied his sadistic side.

 **Aomine:** What do you mean by that, Tetsu?! That sounds so wrong!

 **Kise:** Kurokocchi!

* * *

- _Game resumes_ -

 **Fukui:** Kasamatsu could have just done a fake instead, especially since Imayoshi already jumped first.

 **Kasamatsu:** …

 **Imayoshi:** …

…

 **Aomine:** … I don't know which is more powerful: his voice, or his rebound.

 **Hayakawa:** Of cou(r)se bo(t)h! I do my be(s)t at anythi(n)g I do!

 **Wakamatsu:** …

…

 **Midorima:** … Moriyama-san's shots are weird, but so is yours, Sakurai.

 **Sakurai:** I'm sorry!

 **Takao:** Pffft! What are you saying, Shin-chan? Yours is the weirdest!

 **Mibuchi:** Oh no no no, Kazu-chan. I prefer to call Shin-chan's shots as... _beautiful_ ~

 **Midorima:** !

* * *

- _Second quarter_ -

 **Murasakibara:** Mine-chin, you're running funny. Did you hurt your arm, or were you just missing sweets?

…

 **Susa:** … ' _Yes, it's very true that Imayoshi has a bad_ _and_ _scheming personality. I used to be his_ _dorm neighbor after all, so I know._ _'_

* * *

- _Kaijo time out_ -

 **Fukui:** When did Kise mention that _something_ to their coach before the game?

 **Mayuzumi:** He didn't. They are applying a shounen manga/anime/light novel technique that they would suddenly come up with some secret weapon in the middle of the battle, then claim that they already planned about it beforehand.

 **Fukui:** I've always thought those battle scenes in anime are weird. If they already have some powerful technique up their sleeves, they should have immediately used it and be done with it. They spend episodes wasting their time on the same battle.

 **Mayuzumi:** Yeah, but shounen is all about struggle. Plus, there won't be money if they won't prolong it. Why do you think some mangas have been going on for years and years without any end? And people still buy them.

 **Everyone:** … ' _When did this become an anime discussion?_ '

* * *

- _Ending Song Special Frame_ -

 **Akashi:** Kasamatsu-san, Kiyoshi-san, and Sakurai, Yellow Team looks pretty normal.

 **Momoi:** Except that Sakurai-kun is afraid of them... for some reason.

 **Kise:** Well, Kasamatsu-senpai can be over-enthusiastic.

 **Hyuuga:** And Kiyoshi is plain weird. No wonder he wants to be as far from him as possible.

 **Kiyoshi:** Eh? I'm not scary. I'm friendly. Ahaha!

 **Sakurai:** I'm sorry! I'm sorry!

 **Akashi:** I didn't see Aomine and Kagami yet. Which team do they belong?

 **Aomine:** !

 **Kagami:** !

 **Takao:** - _trying_ _very_ _hard to control his laughter_ -

* * *

- _Last Picture_ -

 **Momoi:** Aww~ Ki-chan, Da-chan, and especially Tetsu-kun, are so cute~ I miss those days...


	26. Episode 24

**Episode 24:**

 **Don't Get The Wrong Idea**

* * *

- _Game resumes_ -

 **Hyuuga:** He actually...

 **Miyaji:** … addressed Kasamatsu-san...

 **Imayoshi:** … as "senpai".

 **Kasamatsu:** But still with an arrogant attitude.

 **Aomine:** Ouch! What was that for?

...

 **Tsuchida:** Whenever I see Kise and Aomine face off, I'm reminded of the battle between the Hero of Light and the Ganguro Lord.

 **Aomine:** Who are you calling 'Ganguro'? And it's supposed to be the 'Dark Lord!'

 **Hyuuga:** And whenever I see Imayoshi-san face-off with Kasamatsu-senpai, for some reason, I'm reminded of Da** Masamu** and Sana** Yukimu**.

 **Imayoshi:** ...

 **Kasamatsu:** ...

…

 **Midorima:** … Kise, should I tell you why you lost?

 **Kise:** Huh? Well, I made a mistake, and...

 **Midorima:** No. It's because you didn't do everything in your power when you tried to copy him. If you were planning to copy him from the start, you should have dyed your hair dark blue, and got a tan. Then you should have said over and over to yourself, "The only one who can beat me is me." Then you should have...

 **Kise:** … ' _I don't think that's the problem there, unless I want to cosplay as Aominecchi. Besides, my modeling career would end in an instant._ '

 **Midorima:** … And most of all, you forgot your lucky item.

 **Kise:** … ' _As always, I don't get that last one._ '

* * *

- _Half-time break:_ _Kuroko meets Kise_ -

 **Akashi:** Kise, you're making Kuroko choose between you or Aomine? That's cruel. It's like, choosing between your self-proclaimed best friend or your former Light.

 **Midorima:** … Is this the friendship over Light thing I often hear? Or was it Light over friendship?

 **Takao:** … Shin-chan, when and where did you hear such things?

 **Midorima:** !

 **Takao:** Besides, it's not 'Light' but 'Love'. I didn't know you're interested in such stuff.

 **Midorima:** … O-of course I'm not! I just happen to hear it alongside the horoscope. Hmph!

* * *

- _3_ _rd_ _quarter_ -

 **Wakamatsu:** It must be his yell that makes his rebound so fearsome. What do you think, Susa?

 **Susa:** He did put me off guard.

 **Wakamatsu:** Right? And just imagine it if you were jumping close to him. My ears felt it was ringing afterwards.

 **Hayakawa:** It's becau(s)e I do my be(s)t at eve(r)ything!

 **Kasamatsu:** …

…

 **Momoi:** Moriyama-san isn't so bad looking, though Tetsu-kun is still a lot better. But I wonder why Moriyama-san isn't that popular with girls.

 **Kise:** Ahaa... It's because he's kind of hopeless when it comes to girls.

 **Moriyama:** What are you saying, Kise? I always do my Internet research, so I know what girls like.

 **Momoi:** …

* * *

- _Aomine commits his 4_ _th_ _foul_ -

 **Mayuzumi** **:** Kise, did you also copy L*vi's constipated expression?

 **Kise:** Eh? I was only trying to copy Aomine. And who's L*vi?

 **Mayuzumi:** … A character from some anime where Murassakibara's kind are running rampant.

 **Kise:** Really? There must be some shortage of snacks then. And Murasakibara without snacks is terrifying.

 **Mayuzumi:** … yeah, you could say that. ' _Human snacks_.'

 **Akashi:** … ' _So, even Murasakibara has an anime of sorts._ '

 **Murasakibara:** Hn?

 **Akashi:** … Nothing.

* * *

- _Kise about to dunk_ -

 **Miyaji:** Aomine only started running after Kise had already jumped. How did he catch up with him, and even overtake him? He even blocked Kise from the opposite side!

 **Ootsubo:** … Don't mind it, Miyaji. Some things are better left unknown.

* * *

- _Ending Song Special Frame_ -

 **Takao:** Hahahahahaha!

 **Akashi:** … For other reasons, this team could have been incredible. But I guess that not everything went smoothly.

 **Takao:** Pffft! Aomine and Kagami kept fighting for the ball even if they were teammates.

 **Kagami:** Oi, you're the one to talk! You passed the ball to the other team!

 **Takao:** Hey, that was a one-time mistake! Shin-chan was like a tall green spotlight, so I just passed the ball to him on reflex! Besides, you and Papa wouldn't stop arguing!

 **Everyone:** … ' _Papa?!_ '

 **Aomine:** If Bakagami just passed the ball to me, we could have won!

 **Kagami:** What was that, Ahomine?!

 **Takao:** See? Papa and Mama are always fighting. I was being ignored, that's why I became rebellious.

 **Everyone:** … ' _How did_ _this_ _become a play-house?!_ '

 **Midorima:** - _fixes glasses_ \- It seems that some people were having worse luck than me that day.

* * *

 _OMAKE:_

 **Akashi:** … Street basketball looks fun.

 **Rakuzan** **team(without Mayuzumi):**!

 **GoM** **except Murasakibara** **:** !

 **Murasakibara:** - _continues munching chips without care_ -

* * *

 **.**

 **PBJane:** As always, thanks for your reviews. To answer Ritsu's question as to how I made this all up... let's just say Gintama does that to one's sanity. It's just a pity that Izuki isn't making much appearance. I like the guy, but I just really don't know how to make puns T^T

If you're curious about the 'real' story behind the extra pictures, then try searching up "Kuroko no Basuke: Let's Play Street Basketball." The one I saw was uploaded in Facebook, and it was divided into two parts. It is also voiced by their voice actors. Anyway, it's many times funnier than my own version, so I highly recommend that you watch it. Plus, there are also extra pictures xD


	27. Episode 25

**Episode 25**

 **Our Basketball**

* * *

- _3_ _rd_ _quarter break_ -

 **Akashi:** "If victorious, we're heroes; if defeated, we're losers." Is that why Seirin is the hero for this show? Then... if Rakuzan had won the Winter Cup back... would this show have been named "Akashi no Zettai Basiuke" instead?

 **Everyone:** … ' _I think that's not the issue here._ '

* * *

- _4_ _th_ _quarter_ -

 **Fukui:** Tsk tsk tsk. Kise, what have you done? You completely ruined the mood! You should've called Aomine plainly instead of shouting 'Aominecchi'. You and Aomine were so intense, then all of the sudden, you called him by a very cute nickname.

 **Kise:** Eeeeh?!

…

 **Furihata:** Look, Kise injured his leg. That's the cue for Kaijou to lose.

 **Fukuda** **:** Shhhh! Not too loud, Furi!

 **Kawahara:** Yeah. Kasamatsu-san could be so scary. We're not as tough as the Generation of Miracles who could withstand their senpai's abuse.

 **Fukuda:** So, even if we think that Kise's injury is just an excuse for the writer to make them lose, we can't voice it out.

 **Kawahara:** Right. Even we think that Kagami's injury was also an excuse so that we won't look that bad even if we lost.

 **Fukuda:** The same could be applied to Kaijou.

 **Furihata:** … Guys, they could hear you.

 **Kawahara and Fukuda:** !

 **Kasamatsu:** …

…

 **Kuroko:** Aomine-kun, you're so rude. My eyes don't look that scary.

…

 **Sakurai:** I'm sorry! I'm sorry, I missed that pass! I'm sorry I forgot to apologize! I'm sorry!

...

 **Kiyoshi** **:** Hm... I wonder how did Aomine pull that air maneuver. In normal speed, he would probably look like he was dancing! Hahaha!

 **Aomine:** - _chokes_ -

…

 **Fukui:** It's another five second violation. How many times has it been?

 **Okamura:** There's no use counting them, Fukui.

 **Fukui:** I know. It's a lost case, just like your gorilla-chin. Some things are just meant that way.

…

 **Hyuuga:** Moriyama-san doing a normal lay-up? That's rare.

 **Moriyama:** - _hair flick_ -

…

 **Akashi:** You were starting to hallucinate, Kise. Your coach should have immediately pulled you out to seek medical attention. This negligence by your team is worrisome. If you want to, I could arrange for you to be transferred to Rakuzan.

 **Kaijou Team:** - _sweat drops_ -

 **Kise:** Umm, no thanks, Akashicchi.

 **Akashi:** Is that so? Too bad. I thought you could be the opposite of a phantom: instead of misdirection, you will attract all the attention to yourself, thus making the team move more easier.

 **Midorima:** So it's like Misdirection Overflow without the Misdirection part. Since he's sparkly enough, and his hair is like a light bulb, that could work. And when the players from the other team already got sick of looking at his face, his not-misdirection will become less effective.

 **Kise:** Hey! Somehow, I feel like you're being mean...

 **Akashi:** - _ignores Kise_ \- As expected of Midorima. You really understand me.

 **Everyone:** … ' _How does that even work?!_ '

…

 **Miyaji:** … They're floating in mid-air.

 **Akashi:** … They're having a conversation in mid-air.

 **Miyaji:** … I give up.

 **Ootsubo:** I thought you already did before.

 **Miyaji:** It's hard to give-up something you've believed in. It's just like smoking: it's easy to say _stop_ , but it's hard to let go.

 **Ootsubo:** I don't get its connection to Physics, but I'll take your words.

* * *

- _Game ends, Kaijou lost_ -

 **Everyone:** … ' _Poor_ _Kise._ '

 **Murasakibara:** … Here, some snacks, Kise-chin.

 **Hyuuga:** Oi, why are you crying, Kiyoshi?

 **Kiyoshi:** Ara? Oh, it's true. Well, I thought that with the ongoing mood, it was the cue to cry. Ahaha!

 **Hyuuga:** …

* * *

- _Touou lockers_ -

 **Koganei:** Hear that, Tsucchi?

 **Tsuchida:** Yeah. Sounds like the typical plot of an anime villain. When you thought that the bad guy, had revealed all his tricks...

 **Koganei:** "… But wait, there's more!"

 **Tsuchida:** Yup, that feeling.

 **Koganei:** You know, it reminds me of those shopping channels where if you buy something, they'll add a lot of extras.

 **Tsuchida:** Hmmm... I guess the same thing could also be applied in Shounen anime/manga.

* * *

- _Kaijou lockers_ -

 **Hyuuga:** Oi, Kiyoshi, why are you crying again?

 **Kiyoshi:** Because Kasamatsu-san is crying! Can't you feel his sorrow?

 **Kasamatsu:** …

 **Hyuuga:** …

* * *

- _Seirin team_ -

 **Hayama:** Wow, they're all telepathic!

…

 **Akashi:** So, no one stayed to watch my team's match?

 **Everyone:** !

 **Akashi:** …

 **Mibuchi:** Ahaha... cheer-up, Sei-chan! Ah, that's right, I'll make some puff pastry! What do you like, Sei-chan?

 **Akashi:** …

* * *

- _Midorima and Takao meets_ -

 **Midorima:** And here I thought it was a new character. It turns out to be just me.

 **Takao** **:** …

…

 **Akashi:** Shin-chan, you shouldn't take names for yourself. You're not a monster, whatever they say.

 **Midorima:** … Thanks, Akashi.

 **Everyone:** … ' _He was actually bothered by it?!_ '

* * *

- _Murasakibara appears_ -

 **Murasakibara:** Look Muro-chin, I'm there.

 **Himuro:** I can see that, Atsushi. Umm... can you please stop pointing at the screen? You're blocking the view.

 **Murasakibara:** Ah, sorry. Mmm... I want those snacks.

* * *

- _Outdoor basketball court: Kagami and Kuroko's scene_ -

 **Kuroko:** Akashi-kun, you're playing all by yourself again. Isn't it kind of lonesome?

 **Kagami:** Yeah, you should go out and try to make some friends.

 **Kuroko:** You're always scaring them with your scissors, that's why they all left.

 **Everyone:** … ' _Oi, oi, you're triggering your death flag here_ '

 **Akashi:** … Okay. I'll try not to bring the scissors next time.

 **Everyone:** ' _He actually listened?!_ '

 **Kuroko:** No other sharp objects either.

 **Akashi:** ... Fine.

 **Everyone:** ...

* * *

- _Credits/Preview_ -

 **Akashi:** That's Hanamiya-san, right? Should I invite him over too?

 **Seirin:** NO, DON'T!

 **Kise:** Yes! Let me crush him for what he almost did to Kurokocchi!

 **Murasakibara:** ... Kise-chin, you're starting to sound like me. It's pissing me off. And you're getting too hot. Ah, it's too irritating.

...

 **Akashi:** I'm there.

 **Mibuchi:** Yes, you are.

 **Akashi:** I look cool.

 **Mibuchi:** Of course you do.

 **Akashi:** … Let's watch it right now.

 **Mibuchi:** That won't do, Sei-chan. It's already getting dark, and they have to go home soon.

 **Akashi:** … che.

* * *

- _Last Picture_ -

 **Kise:** That picture looks...

 **Momoi:** The way they are leaning towards each other...

 **Aomine:** Tetsu, when did you and Kagami got married?

 **Kagami:** We are not!

 **Kuroko:** Please don't doom my future, Aomine-kun.

 **Kise:** I was supposed to say they look like a couple...

 **Akashi:** Don't be ridiculous, Aomine. The legal age of marriage is 18.

 **Midorima:** … there are other pressing concerns than just the legal age of marriage, Akashi.

 **Akashi:** Right. They also need their parent's consent if they are under 20.

 **Midorima:** I'm talking about their gender!

* * *

 _OMAKE_

 **Akashi:** Midorima... you can bend the law, or even change your gender, but you can't make your father rethink his decision.

 **Midorima:** ...

 **Everyone:** ... ' _What kind of father does he have?_ '


	28. Extra

**Warning:** Crack and OOCness ahead. Read at your own risk, or just skip it. Oh, and 'tissue alert' ... though you probably wouldn't need it unless to throw it at that random person who would look at you funny.

* * *

 **Extra (Day 1 Aftermath):**

 **Slumber Party at Akashi's Place**

* * *

- _TV_ _room_ -

 **Hyuuga:** It's already gotten this late. We should get going.

 **Akashi:** But it's just 6 pm...

 **Hyuuga:** Coach's dad will kill us if she returns late.

 **Akashi:** Is that so? Too bad...

 **Everyone:** … ' _I can't see it, but I can_ _clearly_ _feel_ _that_ _he's sulking!_ '

 **Takao:** - _To Midorima_ \- Ah, I'll just go ahead and bring the rickshaw up front.

 **Akashi:** No need, Takao. Just for this day, take the taxi. You deserve it.

 **Midorima:** …

 **Takao:** Eeh?

 **Kiyoshi:** Yes. I'll even contribute with the fare. Here...

 **Akashi:** … Please don't bother, Kiyoshi-san. I'll take care of it. Besides, 100 yen is far from enough.

 **Kiyoshi:** But it's all that I have...

 **Hyuuga:** Then how are you supposed to reach home, idiot?

 **Kiyoshi:** Of course, I'll borrow from you, Hyuuga.

 **Hyuuga:** … Are you serious?!

 **Takao:** Then, what about the rickshaw? I need it to pick-up Shin-chan tomorrow.

 **Akashi:** I'll have it delivered.

 **Everyone:** … ' _won't it be easier to just commute_ _tomorrow_ _?_ '

 **O** **kamura** **:** Yosh! Let's all head home, guys! Himuro, you'll be spending the night at Kagami's, right? How about you, Wen Liu? Fukui rented an apartment near his college, and I'm crashing at my uncle's place. I can ask my uncle to let you stay if you want.

 **Fukui:** No thanks, we already made arrangements. He's staying at my place.

 **Himuro and Okamura:** … ' _I wonder what he's planning to teach the exchange student this time..._ '

 **Kuroko:** What about Mibuchi-san, Hayama-san, Nebuya-san, and Mayuzumi-san? Aren't they from Kyoto?

 **Akashi:** Mayuzumi-san's college is here in Tokyo, so his place is near. As for the other three, they will be spending the night here. But if Mayuzumi-san wishes to join us for old-time's sake, then he's welcome to.

 **Mayuzumi:** No thanks, I'll pass. I have to take out the trash tomorrow.

 **Akashi:** Is that so? Pity.

 **Mayuzumi:** Yeah. Maybe next time. '.. _. like never. No way. Not a chance. I'm sure something's bound to happen. This is Akashi we're talking about._ '

 **Akashi:** Anyway, Kuroko, you and Koganei-san will also be spending the night here.

 **Koganei:** !

 **Kuroko:** … I haven't heard of that arrangement before. When was this decided?

 **Akashi:** Just a few hours ago. I already called your parents about it, and they gave their consent. Kagami will pick up Nigou and your things from your place tomorrow, while Tsuchida-san will take care of Koganei-san's. As for your other needs, I can provide them.

 **Kuroko:** … We don't have a choice, do we?

 **Akashi:** No.

 **Kuroko:** Fine. I want more vanilla milkshakes for tomorrow.

 **Akashi:** With that said, Aida-san, Hyuuga san, I take leave to borrow your Kuroko and Koganei-san.

 **Aida:** A-ah, sure.

 **Hyuuga:** Y-yeah.

 **Momoi:** Mou, I also want to have a sleepover with Tetsu-kun.

 **Akashi:** I'm sorry, Momoi. I cannot allow a charming lady such as yourself to spend a night with only us, men.

 **Momoi:** O-ok. If Akashi-kun says so, I'm sure Tetsu-kun is in good hands.

 **Everyone:** … ' _smooth._ '

* * *

- _Later that night..._ -

 **Koganei:** You're right, Kuroko. The meals here are quite normal. There was that strog-something

 **Kuroko:** Strolghino.

 **Koganei:** Yes, that. It sounds intimidating because it's foreign, but it turned out to be just cured pork. Haha!

 **Kuroko:** … 'I _wonder how special is Iberian pork... Well, since our cheap school canteen could afford it, it mustn't be such a big deal._ '

 **Koganei:** Then there's that Choko-

 **Kuroko:** _Choucroute Royale_

 **Koganei:** Yeah, that. Hey, you're good about remembering these kind of stuff!

 **Kuroko:** … That's because Akashi-kun used to drag us around.

 **Koganei:** Oh. Anyway, about that Chouchoro-

 **Kuroko:** _Choucroute Royale_

 **Koganei:** … that. It sounded intimidating because of the " _Royale_ " thing, but the dish was actually very simple. I think my sister can even cook that if it's just slicing and heating up sausages and meats, and a few potatoes, and just mixing them on a plate.

 **Kuroko:** … ' _I heard_ _they used Iberian pork Kobe beef too_ _._ _Kobe beef is just_ _plain_ _beef from Kobe, right?_ '

 **Koganei:** And the dessert was pretty simple. It was just vanilla pudding

 **Kuroko:** Blancmange

 **Koganei:** Okay, vanilla pudding with a fancy name. It was good, but not as good as my mom's pudding.

 **Kuroko:** … ' _It must be because of the milk. I heard they used milk from Nakazawa foods. I'm not sure what kind of milk is that._ '

 **Koganei:** That tofu soup was probably the most luxurious item for dinner.

 **Kuroko:** Why do you say so?

 **Koganei:** I recognized that tofu. It's the best tofu in Japan, costing around 4k yen a block. Maaan, but it's worth its price.

 **Kuroko:** - _nods_ -

 **Koganei:** You know, I've always thought that Akashi's out of my league, and everything about him screams _rich-kid_. But after today, I could say that he's actually pretty normal, like us. He eats WcDonals, and have normal meals, and stuff. His lifestyle is actually pretty normal, if you cound out this ridiculously huge mansion and the maids and butlers. Anyway, I was wondering why Akashi also invited me for a sleep-over. I understand that he'd invite you, but why me? We're practically strangers.

 **Kuroko:** I was wondering that myself.

 **Koganei:** Right? And this room, it looks even better than a hotel room. Look at that huge bed! Oh, and there are three futons on the floor. Does it mean that some of the players from Rakuzan will be staying with us?

 **Kuroko:** … Actually, this is Akashi-kun's room.

 **Koganei:** …

 **Koganei:** Eeeeeh?!

 **Koganei:** W-what are we doing here then?

 **Kuroko:** Tanaka-san told me that we'll be staying in this room, by Akashi-kun's orders.

 **Koganei:** … I'm surprised by the lack of scissors.

 **SFX:** - _door opening and closing_ -

 **Akashi:** Ah, I see that you've already settled yourselves. I've also just settled my teammates to their room. As for my rumored Scissor Collection, I'm afraid the rumors aren't true. But I do have a pair. Do you need to borrow it, Koganei-san?

 **Koganei:** N-no thanks.

 **Akashi:** Very well.

 **Koganei:** …

 **Kuroko:** …

 **Koganei:** Umm... Akashi... kun. Why are you settling between us on the floor? And who's going to be rooming with us? Is it Mibuchi-san?

 **Akashi:** What are you talking about? The third futon is mine.

 **Koganei:** T-then who's going to be sleeping on the bed?

 **Akashi:** … This is a slumber party. Slumber parties are all about sleeping on the floor with friends.

 **Koganei:** O-oh. I see. ' _Dang, that bed looks very soft. What a waste._ '

 **Kuroko:** … ' _When did he decide a slumber party? And he definitely looks excited._ '

 **Akashi:** …

 **Koganei:** … ' _This is awkward._ '

 **Akashi:** … So–

 **Kuroko:** Why–

 **Akashi:** Oh, you go first, Kuroko.

 **Kur** **o** **k** **o:** No, Akashi-kun goes first.

 **Akashi:** I insist. I am the host this time.

 **Koganei:** … ' _This is way too awkward! And why am I here in the first place?!_ '

 **Kuroko:** … Very well. Akashi-kun, why are we here?

 **Akashi:** The truth is, I have summoned you here for a purpose.

 **Koganei:** And that is...?

 **Akashi:** I was thinking of something to better promote the basketball industry of Japan. And that is...

* * *

- _Meanwhile, in the corridors_ -

 **Mibuchi:** - _humming_ _while walking_ \- ' _I've made some honey-dipped lemons for Sei-chan tomorrow. I wonder if he'll be glad. Kyaaah! Just imagining his smiling face is making me want to squeal!_ '

 **Mibuchi:** - _Still humming_ _and walking_ \- ' _Oh, I heard that Sei-chan's room is in this area. I wonder which room is it? Maybe I should take a little peek. I wonder what his room is like?_ _Sei-chan's room... Oh my, I must get a grip!_ _Ah, but I'm dyi_ _ng_ _to see Sei-chan's room~_ '

 **Mibuchi:** - _stops humming and walking_ \- ' _Hm? I thought I heard a thud in that room? I wonder what's up..._ '

 **Mibuchi:** - _goes to the door of that room_ \- ' _Oh. I could hear Sei-chan talking. Well, a little eavesdropping won't hurt. Teehee~_ '

…

 **Akashi:** … guys doing?

 **Kuroko:** I'm sorry, Akashi-kun. That caught me unprepared.

…

 **Mibuchi:** ' _Oh, it's Tetsu-chan! They must be really good friends during middle school._ '

…

 **Akashi:** What's so strange about wanting to make one? It will surely benefit our country's poor Basketball industry. After all, we'll be making "Akashi no Zettai Basuke," or "The Absolute Basketball Which Akashi Plays."

…

 **Mibuchi:** - _falls off_ -

…

 **Koganei:** Wait guys... did you hear that? Something fell outside.

…

 **Mibuchi:** … ' _Was that_ _Shinji_ _-chan's voice?! Why is he allowed in my Sei-chan's bedroom?!_ '

…

 **Akashi:** Koganei-san, please don't bother. It must be Nebuya-san falling off his bed.

 **Koganei:** E-eh, really? Okay. ' _Wait, they have beds,_ _but_ _we have_ _only_ _futons?_ '

 **Akashi:** Now back to business. I want to make a show called Akashi no Zettai Basuke. Koganei-san, you have a good imagination, so I thought you could be useful. Kuroko already has a successful show, so he has valuable experience about these matters.

 **Kuroko:** Before that, Akashi-kun, you are forgetting something very important. Every shounen show has a heroine, or a female character close to the protagonist. In my show, I have Momoi. Even my side-kick Kagami has Alex, and he and Himuro could be involved in a love triangle.

 **Koganei:** Wow, that's deep. Blood brothers and rivals in both love and basketball. There's a good plot going on there.

 **Kuroko:** Sales are also better with prominent female characters. They could pull-off fan-service and sexy shots. Also, boys won't be interested in a setting where everyone is male. They'll think that it's gay.

 **Akashi:** You have a point. Can I have Momoi then?

 **Kuroko:** That won't do. They'll think that you're rivals with me for her affection.

 **Akashi:** I see... then I must figure out who is my heroine...

…

 **Mibuchi:** ' _Grrr! Sei-chan needs no heroine! No, I could be his heroine! Although I'm not physically female, I have a maiden's heart! Sei-chan, choose me!'_

 **Hayama:** Eeh? Reo-nee, what are you doing there?

 **Mibuchi:** - _loud whisper_ \- Shhh! Quiet, Ko-chan! And you too, Ei-chan! What are you two doing here?

 **Nebuya:** You were taking too long, so we went looking for you.

 **Hayama:** So what were you doing?

 **Mibuchi:** Ah! No, the conversation!

…

 **Kuroko:** So now that the heroine is settled, let's go for another important character: the hero's nemesis. They must be a worthy opponent to the protagonist. They are also usually stronger than the hero at first...

 **Akashi:** But I am absolute. No one should be stronger than me.

…

 **Mibuchi:** ' _Sh*t, I missed it!_ _The most important part!_ _Damn these_ _idiots_ _..._ '

 **Nebuya:** ?

 **Hayama:** ' _Why does Reo-nee looks so pissed?_ '

…

 **Kuroko:** … then, that would be a problem. No one wants a shounen anime where the main character is over-powered.

 **Koganei:** True. Take Kuroko-kun for instance. He's the under-dog of his show, and alone he is even weaker than an average player. But with Kagami and training, and as they strengthened their bonds, they overcame their nemesis, which is you: the Generation of Miracles.

 **Akashi:** … You mean, I'm the villain in Kuroko's show?

 **Koganei:** Err... no, not in that sense. The hero's nemesis doesn't necessarily mean that they are evil. It's just that they have conflicting ideals with the hero. They could be rivals in that sense.

 **Akashi:** I see... Then how about Seirin? Your team defeated mine.

 **Koganei:** That won't also do. Shounen is all about friendship, camaraderie, never giving up, and surpassing hurdles. Seirin team conforms all the ideals of Shounen, that's why we can't be on the wrong end.

 **Kuroko:** In short, Shounen means friendship, bromance, stubbornness, and winning.

 **Koganei:** - _nods twice_ \- Hmm hmm...! Kuroko-kun, what are you saying?

 **Akashi:** I understand. Well... the only other one I could think that could defeat me is me.

 **Kuroko:** … You're starting to sound like Aomine-kun.

 **Akashi:** Well, not _me_ , but the other _me_.

 **Kuroko:** Oh. _That_ guy. Hmm...

…

 **Nebuya:** - _whispers_ \- Reo, what are they doing? Why is Akashi trying to find a nemesis?

 **Mibuchi:** - _whispers back_ \- They are planning for Sei-chan's show. It's going to be called "Akashi no Zettai Basuke."

 **Hayama:** - _whispers loudly_ \- Wow! That sounds amazing! Let's join them!

 **Mibuchi:** - _whispers harshly_ \- No, you idiot! Sei-chan told us not to enter his room! I guess it's for this very reason... ' _Why can't Sei-chan trust us? Or... maybe he wants to surprise us?_ _Like those many surprise training sessions?_ _That would be_ _like_ _Sei-chan indeed..._ _but that's what makes him cute~_

 **Hayama:** Awww...

 **Mibuchi:** -whispers- Shhh! Now, stay quiet, you two!

…

 **Kuroko:** What do you think, Koganei-senpai?

 **Koganei:** Hmm... it's kind of tricky. Young boys nowadays likes a lot of action. If his nemesis is himself, there won't be a lot of face-offs between them. Plus, how would one beat oneself?

 **Akashi:** But he's like my opposite. He is an individualist, while I'm more of a team player.

 **Koganei:** True, your point makes sense.

…

 **Hayama:** - _whispers_ \- Wow. So it's like Aomine's "The only one who can defeat me is me!" That's awesome!

 **Nebuya:** - _whispers_ \- Hmm... the protagonist and the antagonist in one character... sounds cool!

 **Mibuchi:** … ' _I think they're missing a crucial point here. The show is called "Akashi no Zettai Basuke", but he can't have a basketball match by himself._ _How will he confront his "nemesis" then?_ '

…

 **Kuroko:** For now, let's put that idea on hold. How about we move on to the plot since the main character, the team, and the heroine is already established?

 **Koganei:** Yeah, let's do that. Let's start with the hero's story. Why did he start Basketball? What is his goals? What hurdles must he face? How will he overcome it?

 **Akashi:** I'll start from the very beginning...

 **Akashi:** Ever since I was young, my father had been very strict with my upbringing. Because I was born an Akashi, I must excel at everything I do. It was very stressful, and I wasn't even allowed to spend time with my friends – no, I could have, but I had other private lessons awaiting me at home, and so I couldn't afford to spend time with them.

 **Akashi:** My mother was my haven. She would argue with my father to give me more freedom. She would defend me when I would come home muddied because I tried catching bugs in the garden like what my classmates did. And during my free time, she would teach me basketball. She would play with me, even if she was absolutely bad at it. And so, I learned to love basketball.

 **Akashi:** But when I was in fifth grade, my mother passed away. My father became more strict, and he didn't even give me time to mourn for my mother. My number of trophies and accomplishments grew, but deep inside me, I wasn't satisfied. I still wanted to play basketball. Basketball is my treasure, and my mom's memory.

 **Akashi:** I finally convinced my father to let me join the basketball club in Teikou. And that was where I met the other members of the Generation of Miracles, and Kuroko. Somehow, I grew to care for them as friends. Kuroko can tell you more about that time.

 **Akashi:** But one by one, they changed. I felt like they were slowly slipping away from my grasp. I felt like they were leaving me behind. I thought that I had to change, so that I could stay with them. I had to change, so that I could keep them. And that gave birth to my other half.

 **Akashi:** I thought I would be able to keep them in line with my other half, but I was wrong. He drove them away, and thoroughly destroyed the bonds I carefully built. And so I watched, and waited, thinking that there was nothing I could do.

 **Akashi:** … that is, until Kuroko's team sparked something in me, and I resurfaced. But my other half is still there, just watching and waiting when I will stumble. And there's where I end my story.

 **Koganei:** …

 **Kuroko:** …

…

 **Mibuchi:** … - _sob_ _s_ \- ' _I didn't know Sei-chan had such a_ _tragic_ _past...'_

 **Nebuya:** … - _cries_ \- ' _AKASHI! I'll follow you to whatever end_ _you choose!_ '

 **Hayama:** … - _sniffles_ \- ' _Akashi, I swear, I'll make our team the number 1 in Japan!_ '

 **Mibuchi:** … ' _Sei-chan, I shall never leave your side! That, I swear,_ _from_ _this day forth!_ '

…

 **Koganei:** You lost your mother so young... - _sniff-_

 **Koganei** : _…_ and you were raised by a very strict father who doesn't care a damn about his son's happiness... _-sob-_

 **Koganei:** … then your friends left you... - _sniff_ -

 **Koganei:** - _cries_ \- AKACCHI! - _stands up and_ _hugs Akashi_ \- Let's do this! Let's make your "Akashi no Zettai Basuke" come true! Let's turn it into the best show in the entire universe!

 **K** **uroko:** … ' _No comment there.'_

 **K** **oganei:** - _sniff-_ Kuroko-kun, why aren't you affected by his life story? It's so tragic, I could even imagine it in drama!

 **Kuroko:** … ' _It's because I've already heard it for the fifth time now._ _He talks too much when he's high on sugar._ '

 **Koganei:** Yosh! From now on, you can consider me as a friend, Akacchi! You can count on me, whatever it is, and I'll do my best to help you.

 **Akashi:** … Is that true, Koganei-san?

 **Koganei:** Yes! And stop addressing me so formal. We're friends now.

 **Akashi:** Then... Koga... chan?

 **Koganei:** - _tears of joy_ \- Yes. It's Koga-chan, Akacchi.

 **Akashi:** Koga-chan.

 **Koganei:** Akacchi!

 **Akashi:** Koga-chan.

 **Koganei:** Akacchi!

 **Kuroko:** …

 **Akashi:** Koga-chan.

 **Koganei:** Akacchi!

 **Kuroko:** … - _sigh_ -

* * *

 **PBJane:** Umm... I don't know all that foodstuff I just wrote (except tofu soup). Also, I have nothing against Akashi's father. In fact, I'm planning to make a little story about him... if ever I get to continue this pointless and plotless(?) fanfic until season three. I'm actually feeling very conflicted, because I'm trying to focus on my studies. But I badly want to write it. Anyway, I might not upload a thing for months since I usually write ahead (thus the everyday updates). I've actually written half of this whole fic before I started uploading it... and yet still, it almost caught up to me mid-way (thus that 1 week break).

But enough said. Anyway, I'm marking this complete since it's a pain trying to navigate through many chapters. Plus, I'm planning to improve the formatting of the sequel (if ever there will be one). I hope you guys enjoyed 'Season 1'! And thanks for all the reviews! They make my day xD Oh, and if you have questions, I'll just reply via PM. Bye-bee!

 **Preview:** Everyone is flummoxed at the sudden close friendship between Akashi and Koganei. And Tetsuya becomes Akashi's lapdog... _literally_.

 _(In the end, I even made a preview... I'm really hopeless... orz)_


End file.
